5 Concrete Signs The Fight You’re Having Is Worth Ending The Relationship Over
You have a history of disrespecting each other.
Couples are going to fight from time to time. It’s unavoidable. In fact, sometimes arguments can actually be healthy because they give you a chance to learn more about what the other person wants and have a chance to state your own expectations. However, you should always lead with love. If you’re fighting dirty, cursing each other out, and bringing up the meanest insults you can possibly imagine in order to hurt the other person, you need to ask yourself whether this is a relationship you really want to continue. There are ways to disagree without ripping each other apart.
They refuse to accept responsibility for their role in the problem.
If you’re the only person apologizing, even though they’ve made as many mistakes as you, then there’s a problem. You’re never going to overcome this conflict if you’re the only person who is willing to accept responsibility for your behavior. If you can take a step back from your ego and see how you’ve hurt them, then they should be able to do the same. If you’re begging them for forgiveness, even when you feel like they were the one who hurt you worse, then the problem is bigger than this fight.
They crossed an unforgivable boundary.
It doesn’t matter if this is their first mistake if you can’t forgive the magnitude of the mistake. Maybe they’ve never hurt you before. Maybe this is the only time they’ve ever given you reason to doubt their intentions. However, if this mistake was massive enough to shatter your trust in them for good, it might mean the relationship is over. You don’t want to stay with someone who is comfortable hurting you. You don’t want to settle for a relationship where you’re always going to be wondering whether they’ll break your heart again.
This isn’t the first fight. This is simply the most recent fight.
If arguing with them has become a habit that neither of you can break, then maybe you’re not a great fit for each other. Maybe you need a break from each other. It doesn’t matter what the context of the fight is, not really. What matters is that the relationship is bringing you stress. It’s making you miserable. It’s giving you more reasons to cry than to smile. You shouldn’t feel bad about walking away after some silly argument if this is only one fight in a long string of them. After a while, enough is enough.
You can’t come to a compromise – and the relationship can’t continue without one.
Small arguments might get swept under the rug. However, if you’re arguing over something life-changing, like whether you want to have children or move to the other side of the country, then you need to come to an agreement. Otherwise, the relationship can’t continue. You need to figure out whether there’s a way to make you both happy, or whether you’re better off separating in order to chase your own happiness. Even though you love each other dearly, there’s a chance you might need to separate in order to reach your own personal goals.