I am the Last Single Friend ™️ and it can be pretty lonely if I’m being totally honest. Everyone I know is either in love or falling in love or on their way to finding love. And…I am not. But I’m beginning to realize how much I’ve learned solo and what an opportunity this actually is.
Here are five things I learned while everyone else was falling in love without me.
1. I can still appreciate love (even when I’m not in it).
I learned I can appreciate love, even when I’m not in it. After all, I can be the best bridesmaid I can be. I can celebrate engagements and be thrilled about my friends’ blossoming relationships and smile at elderly couples I see still holding hands while walking down the street. I learned that just because love isn’t happening for me now doesn’t mean it never will and I can still enjoy the view from the sidelines. On that note…
2. There are many types of love, and all of them are worth celebrating.
Platonic soulmates are real. Familial love is real. Love for your dog is real. Love for your fellow humans is real. And these other types of love are just as important as the romantic kind.
3. It is always better to be alone than with the wrong person.
It is always better to be alone than with the wrong person. This is a fact. It will always be lonelier, more exhausting, and heartbreaking to try and convince someone else you are worth loving than to just be alone. Or to try and try and try to make a relationship work if it just is not made to. Or to settle for someone because you’ve convinced yourself you love them when you do not. And if I have to be single longer until I find the right person for me, so be it.
4. I will miss this time in my life when it’s my turn to be coupled up.
I learned that being single is great, actually! While it can be lonely at times, I can transform this time alone into solitude. I can enjoy my own company. I can sprawl out on the bed. I can do everything on my time. I learned that I can design a whole life of my own, on my own. And I don’t have to worry about a future partner and how they feel about it because the right person will fit into my life.
5. There’s a time and a place for everything, including romance.
Right now, I am not in love. I am nowhere close to being in love either. But that’s okay because I’m realizing there is a time and a place for everything, including romance. Being single isn’t some damning sign that I am doomed to be alone forever. It just is what it is and I can either embrace this time of my life or be bitter. And I don’t want to spend any of my limited time on this earth bitter, so I won’t.
Here’s to hoping. Here’s to love. Here’s to what’s next.