6 Concrete Signs He Has Commitment Issues
If your person has commitment issues, the relationship might never progress at the pace you’re hoping. In fact, it might never progress at all. It depends on whether your person is interested in working on themselves and making a change or whether they are content with the way things are. Either way, here are some concrete signs that the person you’ve been seeing has commitment issues:
They refuse to put a label on the relationship.
If they’re scared of getting into a relationship, then they technically won’t get into a relationship. Even if you’re doing all of the typical things that couples do — from hanging out on weekends to making out and meeting each other’s friends — they will refuse to put a label on the relationship. They will refuse to admit how much they like you and make your status official. You will remain a friend even when you consider them so much more than that.
They refuse to make plans too far in advance.
They’ll agree to hang out with you over the weekend, but if you ask them to attend a concert or a wedding with you that’s a few months away, they’ll hesitate. They don’t want to commit to anything too far into the future because they’re not sure whether they’re going to be with you in a few months. They’re scared to think that far down the line because if they admit that you’ll be around for months, that’s admitting that they’ve gotten invested in you — and that scares them.
They don’t make room for you, emotionally or physically.
Even if you’ve been spending most nights at their place, they won’t leave out a toothbrush for you or give you a drawer where you can keep your clothes or stock your favorite foods in the fridge. They aren’t letting their home feel like your home because they aren’t interested in sharing their place. They don’t want to give up what’s theirs.
They rarely talk about us.
They use the word I whenever they’re discussing their plans or opinions, even if you share them. They don’t want anyone to group the two of you together. They don’t want anyone to see you as a couple. They want to remain an individual. They want to keep your lives and your identities completely separate.
They avoid discussing your future.
They will never discuss marriage or children or moving in together. Even if you’re joking around, they will immediately change the subject. They only want to focus on today. They want to live in the moment at all moments.
They have an ex who hurt them (and are still dealing with the baggage).
If they’re still talking about how badly their ex hurt them, it might be a red flag. It might mean they are still hung up on their ex — or that they’re still healing from what that ex put them through. And if they’re stuck on a past hurt, they aren’t going to have room in their heart for you.