Breadcrumbing is when someone gives you hope that you’ll end up in a relationship together, but they never actually end up committing to you. Basically, they don’t have any intention of dating you, but they don’t want to lose you either. Here are a few red flags that prove he’s just breadcrumbing you:
There’s no substance in his messages. Your conversations usually follow the same pattern. You say hello. You flirt a little. Then you don’t hear from him from a while. He never has serious, meaningful conversations with you about your life. If you quizzed him, he wouldn’t be able to name your siblings, your hometown, or any of your friends. He only talks to you about surface level things – like how gorgeous you looked in your Instagram photos or how badly he wants to see you again.
He’s vague about the plans he wants to set with you. Even though he might gush about how much he wants to hang out with you and describe the various places he wants to take you – whether that’s bowling with his friends or on a Disney vacation – he never follows through. He talks a big talk, but his actions don’t match his words.
His messages could be read in a million different ways. He is the king of mixed signals. He never gives you a straight answer when you ask about his relationship status or where he sees the relationship with you going. He keeps his answers open-ended so you don’t feel like you’re being rejected, but so he doesn’t feel bad about leading you on either.
He always leaves you wanting more. Just when you’re starting to feel like he’s opening up to you, like things are going well, he stops answering your texts. Or he goes MIA for a few weeks before messaging you again. But before you completely lose interest, he always swoops back in to remind you that he exists and that he ‘cares’ about you because he doesn’t want you falling for someone new.
He uses more emojis than words. He likes your Instagram photos and tells you how good you look on your stories, but the conversation ends there. Instead of having an actual conversation with you, he’ll drop in to tell you that he finds you attractive, and then he’ll set off again.
He exclusively makes last second plans. He refuses to schedule a time and place to meet you ahead of time. He only texts you at the last second and asks to meet up. Then he acts like you’re the reason why you two never hang out. He won’t acknowledge the fact that he’s asking you to drop everything for him at random instead of trying to make a plan that works for you both.
He focuses more on your physical traits than your personality. He might make you feel beautiful – but he doesn’t make you feel smart or funny or interesting. It seems like the only thing he’s really interested in is your looks.