The One Thing Each Birth Month Should Do Before November
There’s probably one small thing you’d be relieved to have done before another month begins. A message you keep meaning to send, something at home that annoys you every morning, or a plan that never gets past the group chat. Here’s one thing for each birth month to do before November.
January: Ask Someone To Take Over One Task
January, remembering what needs to happen can be as much work as doing it. Before November, ask someone you share responsibilities with to take over one recurring task from start to finish. “Could you handle the groceries on Sundays, including checking what we need?” gives them something clear to take on. Next Sunday, when you start mentally checking the fridge, you can remember that someone else has it covered.
February: Send The Thank-You You’ve Only Thought About
There’s a friend who did something small that wasn’t small to you, February. They stayed on the phone while you waited for news, or remembered to ask how the difficult conversation went. You’ve thought several times about how glad you are to know them. Before October ends, put that thought in a message. Mention the thing they did and why it mattered. It can be three sentences, sent on an otherwise uneventful afternoon. They may have no idea you’ve been carrying that kindness around.
March: Put A Date On Something You Want To Do
March, the group chat has had plenty of time to consider your suggestion. Everyone likes the idea of visiting that little museum. Nobody can agree on a weekend. Pick a date before November begins, even if the outing itself happens later, and let people know when you’re going. Choose something you’d also enjoy on your own. Anyone who can make it gets to join you; anyone who can’t can catch the next one. You can finally stop answering “we should!” with “we really should!”
April: Finish The Apology
April, if you’ve been meaning to apologize for snapping at someone, say it before November. It can be simple: “I was short with you earlier. You didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry.” Maybe you were tired or having a difficult day, but you can leave those details out of the first sentence. Give them a chance to answer. A brief, honest conversation can do more than several days of trying to show them you’re in a better mood.
May: Fix The Thing That Annoys You Every Day
The drawer catches. You lift it slightly, pull harder, and get on with your morning. May, you’ve become impressively skilled at working around something you could probably fix. Pick one small, manageable nuisance before November: the loose handle, the entryway pile that makes the door difficult to open. Set aside a little time to deal with it, so tomorrow morning you don’t have to work around it again. There is a very particular satisfaction in reaching for something the next morning and having it simply work. You don’t need a whole home makeover to enjoy that.
June: Ask What They Meant
June, if a vague message has been on your mind, ask what the person meant before November. “We should talk soon” leaves a lot of room to wonder. A simple “Did you have something particular you wanted to talk about?” gives them a chance to fill in what they left out. They might be planning a visit or have news they’d rather tell you over the phone. Whatever it is, you’ll have more to go on than the wording of one text.
July: Bring Back One Small Tradition
July, choose something you miss doing, especially if you’ve been waiting for the exact right people or circumstances to bring it back. Perhaps your family used to play cards after dinner, and now everyone gets up as soon as the plates are cleared. Before November, ask someone to play a hand with you. Teach them the version you remember, including the rule you’re fairly sure your cousin invented. It will feel different with different people at the table. You can still have a very good argument about whose turn it is.
August: Accept A Compliment Without Correcting It
The next time someone says something kind about you, August, try letting them finish. You don’t have to point out the mistake in the presentation they enjoyed or explain why your contribution wasn’t much trouble. Before the month ends, practice a plain “Thank you. I’m glad you liked it.” If you usually follow that with “but,” leave it there this time. You can be pleased that someone noticed your work without listing everything you would have done differently.
September: Use Something You’ve Been Saving
September, somewhere in your phone is a recipe you’ve saved more than once because it looks so good. You’ve watched someone make it, read the comments, and possibly sent it to a friend. You still have no idea what it tastes like. Before November, pick one that looks manageable and get what you need to make it. Try it on an ordinary Tuesday. Maybe it becomes a regular dinner; maybe you decide it looked better in the video. Either way, you’ll finally know what it tastes like.
October: Wear The Outfit You Keep Talking Yourself Out Of
October, put on the combination you liked before you started wondering whether anyone else would like it. The bright socks with the sensible shoes. The earrings that feel a little dramatic for an ordinary lunch. Choose from what you already own and wear it somewhere before the month is over. Skip sending a photo around for a vote first. You can notice halfway through the day that nobody has commented and still be pleased whenever you catch sight of yourself in a window.
November: Make An Album Of The Year So Far
Before your birthday month begins, November, scroll back through your photos and save a handful you want to remember. Include the blurry ones. There may be a ridiculous lunch, a visitor asleep beside your dog, or a picture you took because the view from the bus briefly looked beautiful. Give those moments somewhere to sit together. You don’t have to post the album or turn it into a statement about how well your year went. The picture of that lunch can stay because you remember laughing so hard you couldn’t finish it.
December: Keep One Evening Free
December, open November’s calendar while it still has a little breathing room. Choose one evening you can reasonably keep for yourself and mark it now. You don’t need to decide what you’ll do with it. When an optional invitation comes along, you can offer another date without handing over this one first. Imagine arriving home that evening, taking off your shoes, and realizing there’s nowhere else you have to be. Dinner can take as long as it takes.