You cradle me in your arms
But there’s no spark
I sometimes wonder
If I’m just in the dark.
Given empty promises for days
That you will change.
Into this loving, affectionate man
That I can maybe never bear witness to
Because you don’t desire me
Like you desired all the other girls.
You kiss me with your hands against the side of my face,
You look at me with those warm, kind eyes
You speak to me in that soft, reassuring voice.
But I don’t feel anything.
I don’t feel fire in my soul.
I don’t feel passion pushing me towards you.
It’s safe and comforting.
But I don’t want this.
I want love under the sheets.
I want comfort above the sheets.
I want late night talks, adventures, I want you by my side.
Yet you’re too happy in your own world.
You miss those girls from your past
Because you don’t treat me the same.
I love you, and I know you love me.
But what if your love isn’t what I want?
What if I can’t grow to love this,
what if I desire the passion, the hunger, and the emotions?
I remember you holding me and reassuring me during those long cold nights
Telling me that I was your everything, that I’m the only one.
But if that were true,
How come I can’t feel it?
How come I can’t feel you wanting me, lusting after me?
You say you feel at peace with me.
But you hate certain parts of me that I try so hard to improve.
You say that you want to marry me,
But you want space from me.
You say that you do want me,
But never follow through.
Tell me, baby, tell me, love,
How do I believe you?
Or are these just empty promises?