Hey sis, this one is for you.
The girl that is tired of struggling and playing tug of war with her heart. The girl that no longer recognizes herself because, at some point, her identity became overshadowed by his. The girl that is desperately holding onto hope that he will somehow change because maybe, just maybe, this time will be different, and maybe this time when he apologizes and swears that he loves you, he actually means it.
No, this is not love, sis. You deserve so much better, and in your heart, you already know this. Hear me when I say you are worth so much more! You know how this story goes, yet you still want to believe that somehow you’re the only one that can save him and create some fairytale happily ever after. But plot twist: He does not want to be saved. He’s been playing this song on repeat for so long you don’t even realize the words no longer have any meaning behind them. It’s time to let him go.
How many times have you found yourself in this cycle? Asking the same questions, frustrated because you aren’t being heard, crying in silence, ignoring the same red flags and caution signs? Now is the time to choose YOU and move on! He may have told you that you’ll never find another guy that “loves” you the way he does, and you know what? He is absolutely correct! You won’t meet another man that loves you the way he does, you will meet a man that loves you in all the right ways and how you truly deserve to be loved.
Trust me, I know it is not easy. You’ve settled and become comfortable, and it may seem scary to give your heart to someone else, but it is never too late to choose yourself. I’ve been there myself, and moving on, choosing me, and honoring my peace was exactly the breath of fresh air I needed. It was the greatest gift I could’ve given myself. We are no longer settling—be patient and wait on the love that you deserve, because the real one is worth the wait.
Until that love arrives, please learn to love yourself in all the ways you so freely love others. Not to sound cheesy or cliché, but you really do need to fall in love with YOU first, so that when that love comes along that you deserve, you’ll recognize the raw beauty of it. You’ll be able to recognize it because you now see it in yourself. In the meantime, it’s okay to be on your own. Spend this time creating your image, finding your passions, and learning yourself. Learn your likes and dislikes, your ticks and triggers, your love language. Learn how to sit with your feelings instead of running to whatever or whoever makes you feel validated. Get out and explore, meet new people, find new adventures, have new experiences, and create memories with yourself that you can cherish for a lifetime. Learn to be patient and kind with yourself—you deserve to be handled with care. Become your own safe place so you don’t have to go out looking for it in someone and then be disappointed when they aren’t able to give you what you were meant to give yourself first.
You are a beautiful gem, worthy and more than enough. I know being patient can be difficult, but the love you deserve is worth being patient for. Wait for the love that is kind and gentle, the love that sits with you on your bad days, loving you just as strongly as they would on a good day. Wait for the love that is consistent, that loves constantly and wholeheartedly, not just when it is convenient. Wait for the love that you don’t have to question, the love that doesn’t make excuses or string you along with empty promises. Wait for the love that you prayed for; a patient, understanding, and beautiful love—delicate, handmade, and crafted just for you.