Concrete Signs That You’re Chasing Someone Who Will Never Make You Happy
Sometimes, we chase after people who have no interest in being caught. But it can be hard to tell whether they are genuinely considering a relationship with us or whether they are only stringing us along because they’re clearly enjoying the attention. Because they want you to want them. The question is whether they want you in return. Here are a few signs that you’re chasing someone who will never make you happy, and you owe it to yourself to move on:
They have no interest in treating you as a priority.
It’s understandable if they aren’t able to treat you as their number one priority. However, they should have your name toward the top of the list. If you’ve been running whenever they call but they aren’t able to answer your texts for a week or see you in person even though you aren’t far, then there’s a problem. If they are mistreating you now, but are getting rewarded with all your attention, their attitude probably won’t change even if they end up in a relationship with you. Be careful where you direct your love because you don’t want it going to someone who will take without giving at least a little in return.
They give weak excuses for why they’re treating you terribly.
Instead of apologizing about not having enough time for you and promising to make actionable changes in the future, they place the blame on others. On their boss. On their parents. On you. They never take accountability for ignoring you or making you feel unwanted. They act like this isn’t a problem, and even when you try to bring up your hurt feelings, they grow defensive and act like your anger shouldn’t be aimed at them. They clearly have no interest in doing right by you because they’re comfortable with the way things are now. With them getting everything and you getting crumbs.
They are on a completely different life path than you.
If you want totally different things from your future, then you might not want to spend too much of your present on them. You’re bound to head in different directions unless you make sacrifices for them — and although you might be willing to give everything up for them today, you’re going to regret it tomorrow. You’re going to grow to resent them for getting everything they want while you’re left suffering in silence. Remember, you don’t have to choose between love and *insert dream here.* You can have both when you’re with the right person. If you can’t have it with them, then they must not be that person.
No matter how much time passes or how hard you try, nothing changes.
Sometimes, you meet people at the worst possible time and they need a little while to get ready to date you and give you what you deserve. But if you’ve been sticking by this person for months, or even years, and nothing is changing no matter how hard you fight for them, you need to walk away. You need to find someone who is going to appreciate your effort and do whatever it takes to make room for you in their hectic life. You deserve to be a first priority, not a backup plan they keep around just in case and only call after midnight.