30 People Whose Jobs Require Them To Be In Someone Else’s House Discuss the Weirdest Things They’ve Witnessed

1. A Sad Story

Not really weird but sad. An 80-year-old woman who lived alone had a Christian type of “shrine” dedicated to her daughter in her living room. That’s pretty normal I guess, she said she had lost her 40 years ago and kept her pictures and small items in it.

But the thing is, it turned out that her whole house was filled with similar items. She had written things that she wanted to say to her daughter on small pieces of paper and taped them all over the walls and the cabinet doors. It was everywhere, and it was clear from what she’d written that she had been on her mind 24/7 for the past 40 years.

My job was to do household chores and basically keep her company while I did it. One day she asked me to look for some items that her daughter had made. She had misplaced them and was worried that someone had thrown them away by accident. I couldn’t find them at first, but she looked so defeated that I went to look for them again and actually found them in the back of her storage room. She was so happy. She said that I reminded her of her daughter because I searched so adamantly and didn’t give up.

She couldn’t move very well and had chronic pain and would often talk about wanting to be with her daughter already. She was a super nice person, one of the nicest I’ve worked for. She was just in so much pain that I almost hope that she got her wish.

humanoid1013

2. No Roof

Home healthcare worker. Met with a patient who refused to let me enter his house. Our first visits were conducted on the street, between his car and mine. As he grew to trust me, we graduated to sitting on his front porch. The outside of his house had seen better days, and could use some fixing up, but it really wasn’t all that bad. It was the inside. At some point the roof had progressed from “needs work” to “caved in” and he essentially had no roof, as it was all hanging down in his living room. He didn’t have the money to fix it, or a good tarp. But he did have the money for a tent. And so he lived in a tent inside his house. He still had electricity, and a partial roof over the kitchen.

level 1floridianreader

3. Wasn’t Expecting That

Taxidermy chickens dressed in raincoats.

TheCookMan1

4. A Room For Their What?

Customers built an additional room for their plant, Frank. It was a +30yo schefflera. It had the best sun and a huge pot and automatic watering.

Def my kind of weird.

x4ty2

5. Hoarding In Progress

A riding lawn mower in the living room blocking the front door. No idea how they got that thing in there. She was a hoarder though so that was just one of many things in her house that didn’t belong there.

msmedic2U

6. A Bit Too Much, Perhaps

Very large vanity style nudes of the lady, probably from a decade prior. Some were normal frames, one was like an old style velvet painting.

The apartment was in squalor. Bugs everywhere, food just left out. Then you had those pictures.

That was the weirdest.

Muliciber

7. Land Mines Everywhere

Worked in fire/flood restoration, and have seen some shit, literally and figuratively, lol.

Most memorable was an older ladies’ house, she had two small dogs, while we talking, one of them takes a dump in the main floor living room. She “Febreezed” it, like nothing happened, keeps chatting, I looked around and there were multiple urine stains and about a dozen land mines, just in the one room.

I noped out of there quickly and we refused the gig. The basement would have been horrible as the flood would have brought out all the problems…

Fair_Shake_For_aDad

8. Sex Palace

I’m a pool guy. I used to service 5 pools on one property. Guy who owned them was loaded. Apparently he invented the flesh light. He was really into sexual things and one day I went into this “sex palace” building of his. There were tons of different buildings on the property. There were dildos everywhere, nude statues, beds with beaded curtains on them. It was weird. One of the weirdest guys I’ve ever met. He looks like an old Viking getting ready to go to a rave.

sprinkles512

9. A Trip Back to the 70s

A drawer in the kitchen dedicated to neatly folded plastic bags, another one dedicated to bread closure clips and twists, and 8 gallon bottles of bleach in the basement bathroom. I think she bought bleach whenever it was on sale, not that anything nefarious was going on with it. The house itself was a ’70s time capsule – green hi-low shag, glitter popcorn ceiling, split-level with iron railing for stairs and linoleum landings and kitchen, pink bathroom and avocado bathroom. Amazing time capsule.

Plethorian

10. An Indoor Tree

A literal tree. I install garage doors and needed to go through someone’s house to do some repairs and right in the front entrance was a tree that almost touched the ceiling about 30 feet up. They had cut a huge chunk out of the floor, filled it with dirt like a small garden, and grew a tree inside their house

Luminro

11. The Smell of Cats

It’s not what I saw, it’s what I didn’t see.

Old cat piss has the pungent aroma of ammonia. In this house it hit me like a truck.

I saw no cats. I saw no dogs. Only humans.

Rhomagus

12. Porn Collection

I’m a paramedic. Once I found an old lady with an open leg fracture sprawled over her massive collection of VHS porn. I didn’t even process it at first because all the porcelain figurines and watercolors blocked my noticing all the throbbing cocks and gaping holes.

duck_duck_chicken

13. Jars of Blood

When I was still in EMT school and on my ride alongs, we got a hoarder patient who stored his blood in jam jars under his bed. History of diabetes so I went to get a blood glucose reading and he offers one of them to me to dip the glucometer in…

Several years into EMS now and that’s honestly still my biggest bruh moment.

googlemeagoose

14. A Stove Sauna

Not mine, but my friend was working in a moving company after high school. Entered an apartment they were about to clean out, but the tenants were still there. They had set up shower curtains around the stove (on full heat) and were using it as a sauna, dudes were just sitting there in their undies and throwing water on the stove.

SnooDonuts3448

15. Coming Out of the Closet

From my time as an electrician:

We were called to move a service panel out of a walk-in closet in an apartment. The young gay couple that lived in the place were super nice and they took us to the closet in question. It was absolutely packed with their drag outfits; the most amazing collection of lame, animal print, feather boas and boudoir clothing that I have ever seen. We all moved everything out and got the job done in about two days, and as we were wrapping up, the tenants brought us a little cake congratulating us for coming out of the closet…

kd6hul

16. The Live-In Maid Was A What?

I babysat for this family that had a live in maid. A little weird but whatever. She was nice. Dressed in a strange outfit but whatever.

Parents get back and ask me how the children were. Told them I changed a few diapers nothing big. Then they asked how the maid was. I told them she was fine. Woke up the kids once while she was cleaning.

Mom gets this look on her face and disappears. Dad pays me and tips me well! Asks me to check on the kids one last time. I do.

As I’m leaving I go to say goodbye to the Mother. She has the maid over her knee, and is just whooping her ass. Obviously I’m horrified.

They explain their live in maid is actually a live in sex slave. So the strangest thing I’ve seen is a live in sex maid while babysitting.

cleaning-meaning

17. Behind the Shower Curtain

I’m a housekeeper. Once had a client (who is also a friend) who lives alone in a smaller house. I pretty much always start with the kitchen or bathroom. I went into the bathroom with my cleaning bucket, pulled back the shower curtain and gasped. Totally thought there was a dead body in the tub. Turns out to just be a very realistic (at first glance), high end sex doll and he forgot to warn me she was there. Lol When asked why she was there, he says “How else am I supposed to clean her?” Fair point.

vyletteriot

18. Cornered By An Aggressive Escaped Cock

So some years ago there was a big cock fight ring that was broken in NYC. So Howard Stern went on the radio and called the ASPCA asking about the cock’s since that’s where they were sent. You could just imagine how the that day went lol.

Anyway this was taking place all over northern NJ as well. So I’m dispatched to a building in order to check there electric and I find myself cornered by…you guest it escaped cocks lol.

And they’re trained to be aggressive since they fight to the death in these fights. My report was classic lol.

Ajjos-history

19. Goggles And A Knife

The local police got a surprise when they called to my house one afternoon, I was a taxi driver and they wanted directions to a certain house, I was in the middle of making chutney and I was chopping up a huge pile of onions hence I answered the door with my swimming goggles on and a huge knife in my hand. The older cop, Whom I knew, went into convulsions laughing and the younger one whom I didn’t know, went white as a sheet. I had to bring them in and give them tea lol

Rosieapples

20. Christmas In July

OK no shit:

I saw a house made up entirely of Christmas decorations on every possible piece of available space. They had 3 spinning Christmas trees.

The wife was cooking like ginger snaps or something? And the whole house smelled like the holidays.

It was dead ass the middle of summer.

Fomalhot

21. Like Assistance In A Video Game

Installing internet at a house we were greeted by a woman, she had her kids and were busy so she just directed us to the basement where the cable would be. Going down the stairs we open the door to an empty room, no windows, concrete floor and walls, the only piece of furniture was a small wooden chair in the middle of the room. Upon that chair sat an older man smoking a pipe. He was surprised but greeted us and told us the thing we were looking for was in the next room. We thanked him and closed the door.

MurderDoneRight

22. An Obsessed Brony

I did warranty work on PCs & laptops for years. The absolute weirdest thing I came across was a 70 year old guy that was OBSESSED with My Little Pony, both the original and the newer show. This went far beyond what even a “Brony” would do. He had every toy he could get his hands on (all on shelves displayed), posters everywhere, 3 tv’s all playing different episodes on repeat (I was there long enough to verify that one) and even had a mural painted of all the pony’s from the newer show on the wall of his living room. When his PC booted up, it played the theme song and every icon was changed to one of the pony’s. During the whole repair, he kept asking if I liked the show, who my favorite pony was, etc.

Kervon37

23. Bloody Pads

Thousands of used maxi pads, spread out on nearly all of the surfaces. Someone else walked in first and I saw the look on their face before closing the door, so I had to peak. It is scarred into my memory.

DerpWilson

24. Seasoned Pans

I was petsitting and the people asked me to stay at their house.

The house is pretty cluttered because the woman is a compulsive shopper. There are unopened boxes everywhere. The garage is a complete cube of random shit.

I open the cabinet to get a pan for dinner. They put dirty pots and pans back in the cabinets all crusted with food.

I called the guy to say WTF and he said “Oh the pans are seasoning.” That’s not how that works, man.

I was outie. I just came over to feed the animals after that. No way was I going to stay there.

Botryoid2000

25. Goosebumps PTSD

Did Instakart during the lockdowns. One disabled dude had a collection of ventriloquist dummies in his living room.

I’m talking hundreds. On the shelves on the couches seated on the floors. I got TF out of there FAST.

I read goosebumps as a kid. I know where this leads.

Grotesque-penguin

26. Watch For Bodies

Stepping over bodies in a basement trying to get to the electrical panel to turn the power back on. Yes, everyone was alive just past out from the drugs. This was normal in the 80’s.

Ajjos-history

27. Cow Butchering In The Kitchen

An entire dead cow in the kitchen on a tarp. They were butchering it themselves right there in the kitchen. Pretty sure it was a rental.

Willing_Employer_681

28. Billing You For That Craziness

I’m a professional plumber and one time I showed up to a house for a “clog job” (this means when someone has put too much poop down the pipe and it clogs it.) Well long story short they had a room called Dog Room and they told me not to go in, but I was pretty sure the pipes went through there, so I opened the door to check out the pipes. But it had hundreds of hot dogs on the carpet, they were all perfectly lined up in rows about 1″ apart. The entire room was full of them and at the edges of the room it looks like they cut the dogs with scissors or something to make them line up. I never found out what Dog Room was but I billed them $30 extra for Manual Inspection and that’s what I put on when something weird happens. It’s just free money for me when something happens that I hate.

drewtoothpaste

29. Why No Warning?

So on another occasion I had to enter a basement to reconnect the electric. So using my flashlight I started to slowly make my way to electrical panel. I crouched low while making sure I didn’t trip over or step in a hole. As I followed the path my light created I pointed up up to see how much further I had to go and the light emitted it’s glow on a pig hanging and curing from the beams.

This shocking discovery caused me to scream like a little girl on a school yard playground! I asked the owner how come he didn’t warn me he said “I thought you were only asking about live animals!”

Ajjos-history

30. Loose Nightmares

I was an electrician doing some house calls.

So many houses I went to had clothes and trash piled up in every room. Floor to ceiling with garbage. Carved out of the rooms were one foot paths that you can walk through. The smell was the worst thing I have ever had to experience.

That wasn’t the worst thing though.

The worst house I went to was disgusting. I walked in the house and there were reptiles everywhere. Snakes, lizards, and spiders were everywhere. They were not in cages, they were just crawling around the house. I could barely even walk in the house. It was nasty. The odor from all of the animals reeked. Having to work in that environment was by far the scariest and worst thing possible. I could not even focus.

huntermgriffith