You should never feel like you have to convince someone to love you. That you need to prove your worth, that they should spend time with you. That they should want to spend time with you. You should never have to convince someone that you are funny, smart, pretty, or hard-working.
You should never be with someone that makes you question yourself. That makes you ask, “Am I worth it?” or “Do I bring enough to the table that I should be desired?”
Remember when you were in preschool and the kids would bring in their favorite items to show to classmates? How they were so proud of what they had, wanting to brag about it, to show it to people who matter? You should feel like that lucky pet rock. Irreplaceable. Valued. Different from all the other rocks that could have been picked up on the path. Well0loved, kept nearby, a token of positive energy.
You should never feel like a second choice, a backup plan. Second tier. You should feel pursued back. Wanted. Worthy. Special.
Another person in your life should be an addition, in that they should not subtract from who you are or how much you matter. They should add to your self-esteem. They should add to that feeling that you matter, that you are unique and cared for. It’s not their job to build you up from the bottom (that is completely your own responsibility), but they shouldn’t bring you down from where you were when they came into your life.
You should bend some, and they should bend some back. An understanding should be in place that you both are willing to be flexible. That you can dance through this life together, maybe not knowing the steps but knowing how to move with your partner without always stepping on their feet.
We are all flawed. Literally no one is perfect, but you shouldn’t feel like you have to convince someone to love you.