The Eulogy Of You And Me

So much has happened since I first heard Cucurucu
From a beautiful man that’s made me a fool—
I fell head over heels for you
And I think that you may have loved me, too 

I wrote a single poem for you
Titled Cucurucu
Because I couldn’t stop
Thinking of you
Dreaming of you
Spinning around wishing
I was in love with you 

You said that poem made you fall for me
But I think when you said it
I was in a dream
Because now we are nothing
And there is nothing
But songs I can’t bear to listen to or sing
Because you left my heart wandering
What did I do
To be left by you—
All I have left now is Cucurucu 

You made me imagine
How we would be together
When I was afraid to believe

When I couldn’t see
And I was afraid to see

But now that we’re broken
All I can see
Is these imagined dreams
And what I thought was my destiny 

We would walk through Boston
Sometime in the fall
And spend Thanksgiving
Being thankful for it all
Sleep in a cabin by a lake
I’d push you in
And we’d spend the day
Whispering each other’s name
We’d watch the stars
On the balcony
Of a treehouse in the woods
And bask in the warmth of feelings of love
And being seen and understood 

We imagined where we would go
If I visited you
And if you visited me
The loveliest dreams I have ever dreamed
But that’s all they were
Not are
Just dreams and dead things
Cobwebs and crumbs
For a girl so desperate to be loved
(By you) 

Your promises were just sweet nothings
Floating away in the wind
Stories you’d weave and lies you’d spin
Eventually wearing me thin
And thinner
So thin I had to disappear
Like a light into oblivion 

I asked you to describe love in a single word
And you picked uncontrollable
You said you can’t just wake up one day
And decide you don’t love them anymore
But that’s exactly what you did with me
So quickly
So freely
So quietly

Why did you ever make me think
You could ever be in love with me