Leaving a toxic and manipulative relationship is not easy. What’s harder is the process of healing from it.
Healing from a toxic and manipulative relationship does not necessarily mean that you will be able to forget all the emotional trauma and abuse that you experienced, like it never happened. The truth of it is that the memories will stay with you. It may even haunt you at times.
Do not deny these memories and experiences; hence, grow from it. Never rationalize and never make excuses for your ex-partner’s behavior.
There’s also no guarantee of the duration of healing. People have different ways to handle and cope—do not compare your progress to others. Follow your own phase.
Always remember, the first step of healing is acceptance. You must come to terms with the fact that you have been a victim of a manipulative and toxic partner. Denial and rationalizing the situation will only keep you stuck. Acknowledge the pain, but do not let yourself drown in it. You may come out of the relationship damaged and lost but what’s important is to move forward.
Forgiving yourself is the next step. This will be one of the greatest challenges you will face after you have left a toxic relationship.
Being a victim of manipulation does not define who you are. You simply loved a manipulative person. It’s a temporary lapse in judgment that is acceptable and understandable. Each of us have been victims of love in one way or another. You are not gullible, you are not a fool. Always remember, you just loved, and do not let anyone blame you for that.
It may feel like you have been shattered at first, but this is the time to gather all your fragments, to reestablish and gain your independence.
You are now free. You are now free to do what you want without hesitation. Be happy and do the things you love. Try new things. Discover a new hobby. Socialize with your old friends and meet new ones.
Rediscover your true self. It may seem that it’s gone, but somewhere, somehow, in time, you will find it again.
Leaving a toxic relationship was one of the best decisions you have made. Do not let this experience make you lose your faith in love. The right person will come, sometimes when you least expect it.