This Is How It Feels When You Lose Your Almost

You feel confused about what changed their mind. You don’t understand why they were so flirtatious with you one day, only to get up and walk away from you the next day. You don’t feel like anything has changed from your side so you can’t pinpoint what caused them to leave. Were they interested in someone else on the side? Did they get bored of you? Did you do something wrong? You’re left with dozens of unanswered questions, and there’s no telling whether you’re ever going to get a straight answer.

You feel like you’re missing out a future you were promised. Even though this person never made an official commitment to you, they implied that they would be sticking around for a while. They made you feel like you were special, so you started to get excited about all of the things that you would do together – the trips you would take, the dates you would go on, the holidays you would celebrate. Now that they’re gone, you feel like the imaginary future you’ve been waiting for has been erased. You feel like you missed out on moments you were counting down to.

You feel like you wasted a good chunk of your time. There are other things you could have been doing, aside from chasing after this person who didn’t even want you. You could have gotten into another, healthier relationship. You could have been focused on your career or friendships. You spent so much time on this person because you thought your hard work would pay off. You thought you would become a real couple. Now that it’s over, you feel like you should’ve made better use of your precious time.

You feel like you misread the entire situation. A part of you wonders whether you’re to blame for this misunderstanding. Did you read them entirely wrong? Were you only seeing what you wanted to see? Were you ignoring obvious red flags? You aren’t sure whether you could have avoided this mess if you paid closer attention to their signals. Maybe they didn’t do anything wrong and you simply assumed that they felt the same way as you instead of sitting down and having a conversation.

You feel like you were strung along and used. Once you stop blaming yourself, you’ll start blaming this other person. After all, they knew how you felt about them and they flirted with you anyway. They made you feel like there was a chance they would date you, then left you crying alone. They knew they were hurting you – but that didn’t stop them. They wanted the confidence boost. They wanted some fun weeks of flirting.

You feel like your heart is broken. Even though you never dated this person, you cared deeply about this person. You grew attached to this person. So it’s no wonder why your heart feels completely shattered. You’re grieving a relationship that never reached its full potential. You’re missing this person who you thought was going to be permanent, but turned out to be only temporary.