You’re the kind of person who can move mountains when you put your mind to it—which is admirable, inspiring, and even a little daunting for those around you. Don’t let anyone convince you that you’re simply too idealistic, too naive, or too overconfident, because the truth is that people don’t always know how to handle your energy and will sometimes default to tearing it down instead. But most importantly, don’t ever convince yourself that your power is not important.
Autumn is a good time to slow down, to look back at what you’ve done this year and fully appreciate all that you’ve been through and all you’ve accomplished. Sometimes you get so focused on what’s next, on what more there is to do, that you don’t take the time to process everything that’s already happened. But this is your sign to take a step back and celebrate yourself for getting to where you are now—and a reminder that you don’t always have to keep charging forward.
Be gentle with yourself. You have a tendency to beat yourself up when things go wrong or cling on to regrets when you feel like you’ve made the wrong decision. But here’s the thing: No one has all the answers, and everything is going to look a lot clearer in hindsight than it ever will in the moment. Just because you didn’t get the outcome you were hoping for doesn’t mean you didn’t choose what felt best in the moment. All you can do is keep trying, and that’s enough.
You can love people but recognize they aren’t good for you. You can be in a position in life that you know you’re lucky to be in but still not be happy. You can be perfectly content with everything you have one day only to feel like something is missing in the next. And that’s okay. Life is nuanced and so are we. We grow, and we learn, and we change, and sometimes that means the things we want and need change too. And sometimes the best thing we can do is learn to honor the good these things brought into our lives and then let them go.
Never let anyone convince you that you’re too much, that you take up too much space, that you’re difficult to love—and especially never let you convince yourself of that. You may not be for everybody but the truth is nobody ever is, but the people who love you do so fiercely. You don’t have to give up any part of yourself for anyone else, because the people worth being in your life will look at everything you are and only want you to shine brighter.
Life is full of responsibilities, but never get so caught up in what you feel like you need to do that you forget it’s full of fun, too. Sometimes we get so caught up in what we think we need to be doing right now that we forget to take advantage of the opportunities as they arise. But life is too short to only focus on the things we think we have to do, and if we keep putting off the things we want to do, it’s likely we’ll never actually do them. So this is the time to say “eff it” and do something simply because you want the experience of it—and if you feel guilty for doing something out of pure joy, maybe it’s time to ask yourself why that is.
I hope you trust that the hard times pass. In the moment, life can feel so heavy that we’re convinced we’ll never feel lighthearted again. But know that the grief, the hurt, the betrayal you may feel right now isn’t a forever thing, because even though time may not heal all wounds, they will transform them. You will know better days and happier times, and someday you’ll look back at this moment and realize that the darkness can make us shortsighted. Trust that you can make it through anything, even this.
Take a chance on something that could make you happy. It’s not always easy to take a leap of faith—in fact, it’s sometimes terrifying—but you’ll never know what could happen if you’re never brave enough to try. If it doesn’t work out, that’s okay—you’ll be okay, even if you don’t think you will be initially. But what if it does work out? How beautiful could life be if only given the opportunity?
It’s easy to look at the world and wonder why it seems like so many people have their lives together when you can’t always figure out how to do it. Other people can make life look so easy—but of course, that’s just how it seems on the outside. The truth is, most people don’t really know what they’re doing; we’re all just making up things as we go along and trying to learn the best we can. Just know that you aren’t behind; know that you aren’t any more lost than anyone else.
You may not always have the resources you’d like, but you do have the willpower to make your life exactly what you want it to be. It’s easy to convince ourselves that it’s not the right time, or that it’s better if we want till we have everything we think we need before we go after what we want. While it’s true that sometimes it’s good to wait just a bit till you have your plan in order, make sure that’s not just an excuse you’re using to stop yourself from going after the things you want.
Sometimes you get so fixated on one aspect of your life that you forget to nourish all the other parts. It’s okay to give certain things a little more attention than others, but you’re getting into dangerous territory once you start neglecting them. This is your reminder to step back and consider the parts of your life that deserve a little more TCL or the people who deserve that text back—you’ll thank yourself later for putting in the effort.
Sometimes life feels like it’s moving too fast for you to keep up. You feel like you’re falling behind or struggling just to get to where you need to be. When things get too much, I hope you know it’s okay to take a break, to retreat from the world and take care of your mental health before putting yourself back out there. After all, the longer you put off your need to rest, the harder it’ll be to keep going—and the more severe the consequences will be on your long-term mental health.