When You Stop Putting In Effort, You’ll Lose Her Forever
When you stop putting in effort, you’re making it clear that she isn’t toward the top of your priority list. It doesn’t matter how much you claim you care about her because your actions are saying otherwise. They’re insinuating that there are a thousand other things that you care about more than making her happy, that you aren’t concerned with how she’s doing because your main focus lies elsewhere.
When you stop putting in effort, you’re allowing the relationship to become one-sided. You’re allowing her to take on the bulk of the work. You’re sticking her with the responsibilities of two people. You’re forcing her to be in charge of sending the first texts and planning weekend dates because you aren’t taking the initiative to do them yourself. You’re giving her a bunch of extra work that isn’t supposed to be entirely on her.
When you stop putting in effort, you are going to cause her sleepless nights. You are going to stir up her self-doubt and make her wonder why she doesn’t seem to be enough. She’s going to question herself before she questions you, which is going to damage her sense of self. It’s going to make her wonder why she isn’t worth your effort, why you would risk watching her walk away. If you really care about her, you would never want to make her feel this small. You would never want to be the cause of so many tears.
When you stop putting in effort, you are giving the relationship permission to die. After all, if she wasn’t leaping to the rescue and doing all the work, then there would be no conversations. There would be no dates. You would no longer be a part of each other’s lives. And whether you’re okay with that or not, the lack of effort makes it feel like you’re fine with losing her. It makes it feel like the relationship means nothing to you.
If you care about her, show it. Don’t assume she already knows. Don’t assume you can stop trying because you already ‘have’ her. You need to continuously put in effort, whether you’ve been together for months or decades, whether you feel like she’s ever going to leave you or not. If you love her, the least you can do is contribute. The bare minimum is not nearly enough.
When you stop putting in effort, you’re disrespecting her. You’re disrespecting the relationship. You’re making your feelings loud and clear — and the message isn’t a good one.
When you stop putting in effort, you are going to lose her forever. It might not happen today. It might not happen tomorrow. But eventually, she is going to grow to resent how much she has been offering you and how little she is receiving in return. Eventually, she is going to remember her worth and wonder why she would waste another moment with someone who is unwilling to give her the energy she deserves. Eventually, she is going to come to her senses and ask for more.