Vera Arsic

When You’re In A Relationship With The Right Person, You Don’t Have To Change A Thing About Yourself

When you’re in a relationship with the right person, you won’t have to change or act like someone else to feel accepted.

When you are with a person that loves you, they won’t care if you are too sensitive, too bossy, too loud, too quiet, too introverted, or too messy. When you are with the right person, they won’t care about how you carry yourself, how you dress, or how your hair falls messily across your face. The right person will embrace every bit of you, even the parts you find are broken and imperfect. All they will see is perfection in everything you ever wanted to hide.

The truth is, love isn’t real when someone blatantly or indirectly criticizes you for who you are. Love isn’t real when the other person only feels elated when you are who they want you to be. Love isn’t real when you feel the pressure to mold yourself to fit in the heart and arms of another. No, you will eventually dissolve and want to slip away. Real love is when you can drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, take a deep breath, and be you.

Real love is when you don’t have to think twice before you say something. Real love is when you don’t have to play out scenarios in your head before you act a certain way. Real love doesn’t feel fragile and uncertain. Real love doesn’t feel like you can easily be walked out on because they have options.

When you’re in a relationship with the right person, it feels warm. It brings on comfort and happiness. A love song on the radio finally makes sense. It feels raw and real. You feel a lump in your throat when they leave your side because you want them to return home safely. There’s no ‘one thing’ that pumps happiness into your heart, instead you can find it in everything, even on a lazy Sunday.

Real love doesn’t just last until the first years up, it continues and grows every single day. They listen to you when you need to vent. They get excited to see you. They make every effort to resolve. They remember details about your past – how you felt, what you said, and what terrified you. They wrap their heart around your troubled past without making you feel ashamed. They realize love is ongoing work, not an assignment with an end date.

Real love is knowing they will love you unconditionally when your skin folds, when you ask the same question 10 times, when you lose your hair, forget the lyrics to your favorite song, and maybe even one day can’t remember their name.