10 Women Share How They Secretly Feel When Close Guy Friends Confess Feelings
Tom Morbey

10 Women Share How They Secretly Feel When Close Guy Friends Confess Feelings

“Depends if I’m single at the time, and how he says it. If I’m in a relationship and it is in any way other than a past tense fun story type of thing that came up naturally (as in like asking why they did something dumb in college and they are like ‘because I had a crush on you and was too shy to be alone with you’ type of deal), I’d be pissed.” — AccountWasFound

“Dread really. I want my friend to see me as a friend too, regardless of what’s on the outside. The same way they would see their other friends. Any time I have felt like the confession is coming it’s disappointing because whether I respond with a yes or a no it will still affect the friendship. It also makes me wonder if the only reason that this person wanted to be friends with me is because he saw me as a potential sexual interest. Not because he saw me as a person or because of the friendship I can offer.” — PrincessOfSnacks

“The best partners are the ones you are friends with first, so I was thrilled when my friend opened that possibility with me. We are now married. With other friends I have politely declined and we have returned to the friendship with no problems whatsoever. Not everything has to be a big deal.” — PattersonsOlady

“I think what happens before this declaration matters a lot. Like have you both been flirting a little and does she seems receptive? Have you hung out at all just the two of you? Has she chatted with you about her romantic feelings for other people? If the answers are yes yes and no, proceed and things will more than likely go pretty well. I think in my personal experience, it’s worst when it’s completely out of left field, like you genuinely had no clue until that second. This happened to me and I just kind of agreed to go out on the spot because I liked him as a person and wanted to give it a chance. It was a bad relationship for both of us and ended with a lot of hurt feelings, and honestly it was my fault for not having more of a backbone about it. It’s definitely awkward though, especially if you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or make anyone feel unworthy or unwanted.” — Loafthemagnificent

“Uncomfortable. Because 9/10 times, the friendship dies after they confess their feelings to you. Especially if you start dating someone.” — urbanlulu

“It’s awkward. I never really had guy friends, and the first one I had told me he liked me even though he knew I was engaged and had met my fiancé. I am still cordial on social media if I interact with him, but I don’t see him in person anymore, as it just became weird.” — NeviaFirin

“I would be respectful and acknowledge their feelings but let them know that I unfortunately only want a platonic relationship with them. I would thank them for being honest and having the courage to tell me.” — badgergirl90

“Annoyed, to be honest. Especially now that I’ve been in a relationship for so long. In the beginning of it, I had quite a few of what I thought were my friends admit they ‘had feelings for me.’ Really I think that was their last effort to try to get into my pants because that’s the way they acted. Of course not every guy is like that. I do have friends that I know have had crushes on me, but they’re kept at a distance.” — redvelvetcakebatter

“I might be in the minority, but I’d prefer if they were upfront rather than playing coy and never really giving me the opportunity to give them a straight answer of ‘I’m not interested.’ I’d say not confessing puts me in the more uncomfortable position. On multiple occasions I’ve had guy friends beat around this bush making remarks that clearly indicated romantic interest with plausible deniability and I’ve just been blunt and said, ‘Hey, I just wanna be clear that I’m not interested in you that way.’ For example if they’re making remarks about wanting to make me dinner, and depending on the vibe, add that I’d be interested in hanging out like that in a platonic way. I’ve had guys get upset and stop talking to me, but in that case, they clearly weren’t my friend. I’ve also had plenty of guys get shocked at first, but then thank me for being upfront and are still my friend. If I get a crush on a guy friend, I just ask them out, even though it’s scary. It makes getting over the crush a lot easier and helps preserve the friendship in the long run imo.” — CommunistElk

“Honestly? A bit of sadness and dread. It’s a mixture of ‘what did I do to make him catch feelings for me,’ ‘is he only this nice to me because he likes me’ and ‘where will our friendship go from here, can we still even be friends?’” — ThrowRARAw