11 Brutally Honest Truths About Relationships That Are Hard To Hear

“People who have been psychologically/emotionally/physically damaged are still responsible for their behavior. My first long-term relationship was with a guy who was emotionally manipulative but I put up with it because he had a fucked up childhood and didn’t know any better.” — strawberrykoff

“If you can’t put the past behind you, the relationship is going to fail.” — [deleted]

“Both of you will have to change things about yourself, and make compromises that will mean you don’t always get to do or have things exactly as you want. People always say things like ‘be true to yourself – if he loves you he’ll accept you as you are,’ except the way you conduct yourself when you are single is different to how you conduct yourself when you are in a relationship. If you live together and you say you’re going out for a few drinks but then get wasted and don’t come home until morning without a call or text, then you’re a bit of a shit partner.” —  RadiumGirl

“90% of the time trying to ‘get them back’ is a waste of time. Even if you do, you don’t want to be in a relationship with someone that doesn’t want to be with you.” — MinecraftHardon

“Love is NOT all you need. This fairy tale keeps people in relationships longer than necessary. Sometimes you can love each other deeply and the relationship is still shit. It’s the most sad kind of breakup, but sometimes it needs to happen.” — nedsbones

“Some people don’t care if they hurt you. They’re only there for selfish reasons, and don’t really give a shit about how you feel. Sometimes people will get into relationships thinking that it’s the answer for all their issues, and when things don’t get better, they lash out at their partner.” — zero3617

“Any idiot can fall in love, but commitment is a choice you make. Some people aren’t capable of making it.” — thousandtrees

“Some people get lucky with perfect relationships just like some people get to do what they love for a job. For everyone else, relationships take work. Sometimes you have to change, grow up, be the one who loses an argument, learn to get over shit and move on, and find a way to keep your relationship healthy. When people say relationships take work, that is what they mean. You have to make sure the person you’re with is willing and/or capable of putting the work in to.” — lets_hit_reset

“You will create an ideal version of them based on your own expectations and desires and hormones, and that version does not exist, and you will eventually realize it.” — [deleted]

“You can do everything right and he/she may still leave you anyway, for things or issues beyond anyone’s control…” — Burocracia

“That honeymoon phase of ‘I must look my best all the time’ ends. Eventually your SO is going to fart in front of you. There will be a day where you have violent food poisoning and will be spewing out of both ends, and you cannot hide this from them. You will poop at their house. Your girlfriend will stop shaving her legs for a few days or not shower because she doesn’t feel like it. Hair will not be done, make up will not be worn, frumpy clothes will be on. Your boyfriend will sit from dawn til dusk in his boxers playing video games, only moving to get a drink or pee. You will relax around each other and that’s HEALTHY.” — pastapillow