13 Relationship Rules To Memorize
Carlie Boshoff

13 Relationship Rules Every Woman Should Remember To Avoid Toxic Love

“If someone does not want to hear you, there is no way you can phrase anything to make them listen.” — CurrentSingleStatus

“Never assume anything. What helped me is two things: random checks just to be sure and to identify and question all my assumptions and see if there’s an actual basis behind it and if that basis is good enough.” — MisterXnumberidk

“Having a lot in common doesn’t equal a good relationship. It’s just a decent starting foundation.” — ironicallyunstable

“Listen to how you describe your partner to friends. That will tell you a lot about how you feel about them. If you’re nervous about introducing them, listen to why. If you’re apologizing for their actions, pausing to reframe positive ways to speak about them, or ignoring the red flags, then listen to that instinct. If you’re constantly talking about the problems or hiding them, pay attention to why. I remember being in one relationship and having those feelings of ‘should I introduce her to the family, when I talk to others about her I’m exhausted from some argument, etc.’ I remember another relationship thinking, ‘Oh I would love her to meet the family, she’d get along with everyone’s kids, my friends would love her, I just had this great moment with her and I wanted to tell people about it, I enjoy talking about her.’ When you experience that difference (and you have the wisdom and experience to know you’re not being deluded by things like abuse or newness or getting caught up in a big fire that’s going to burn out fast) it tells you so much.” — ConvenienceStoreDiet

“When an argument comes out of nowhere, ask ‘are you yelling at me, or to me?’ It’s helped with a lot of arguments. Sometimes we just need a backboard to scream at, and 9/10 times that backboard is your significant other, and a lot of arguments get bad because they don’t know you’re just releasing anger, which is healthy in the right way.” — spenser1994

“If they’ll put their hands on you once, they absolutely will do it again no matter how hard they cry and promise they won’t. The second your partner physically hits you, walk away from them because that’s just the start of it.” — uncledanthemetalman

“If they don’t respect your boundaries while dating, they won’t respect them in marriage.” — Rachel1578

“I have learned that it’s okay to sleep off a fight. Don’t have to ‘resolve’ everything right then and there. Give each other space to let steam off and talk in the morning.” — beanedjibe

“You cannot help someone who does not want to be helped.” — Diesel07012012

“When your partner talks about a problem or annoyance or something negative that doesn’t mean you have to fix it.” — Rememberwork

“It’s not what they do when everyone is watching, it’s what they do when nobody is watching that counts.” — Mysterea_Wisterea

“Always say ‘that looks good on you’ instead of ‘you look good in that.’ It may mean the same thing to you, but it does NOT to them.” — I_M_urbanspaceman

“Admitting your feelings and being vulnerable should never turn into an argument.” — Boterhamke