13 Romance Myths That Are Going To Destroy Your Dating Life
Allyssa Sayers

13 Romance Myths That Will Destroy Your Dating Life

Remember, love isn’t exactly the same as you see on the big screen. Real life is a whole lot messier. Here are some romance myths from books and movies that get love entirely wrong:

“That sex is the be-all end-all of relationships. Ok, I love sex. Sex is great. But if it’s the only connection you have with someone and you’re in a long-term relationship (read: marriage), you’re gonna have a bad time. That’s why I hate movies like P.S. I Love You or The Notebook, because the closeness of the relationship is demonstrated almost exclusively through sex. It’s like sex = love. Which is totally not true.” — theirishone

“Another myth I hate is when couples brag about how they never fight and everyone thinks that makes them perfect. Sorry to break it to you, but if you’ve never fought with your SO you’re both holding something back, and a good fight every once in a while makes the relationship stronger in the long run. It also usually means that one person controls the relationship, and the other person never says anything about it because they’re afraid of throwing off the balance…” — annanoemi

“This one is not necessarily a myth, but more of a mindset. Romantic stories of any kind tend to focus on the beginning of a relationship, the falling-in-love period: you meet someone! Emotional rollercoaster! Intense attraction! Some kind of misunderstanding! Reconciliation! Grand romantic moment at the end that hints at a golden future!! I’ve known a lot of people who’ve internalized these kinds of books and films so thoroughly that they’re just addicted to beginnings. Once a relationship of theirs settles into something stable, they go find a new spark with someone else. They have no idea how to sustain a relationship past the whirlwind romance period.” — PipPipCheerio

“The shut up kiss. If I’m angry at you, I don’t want to be kissed. I want to be listened to. Kissing me will not make me melt into your arms and forget all the problems.” — arguewithatree

“It annoys the crap out of me how they over-simplify being an international couple. If you meet someone from another country, it’s nowhere near as easy as just flying home together. I think it’s because of movies people think the immigration process is easy, but in reality it’s literally a 6+ month wait (if you are REALLY lucky), several thousand dollars, a minimum income limit, and 2+ lbs of paperwork (not kidding about that).” — [deleted]

If it’s meant to be, you’ll end up together. Nope, you actually end up together by making the effort and being together.” — [deleted]

“I hate it that the very first time a couple sleeps together is always perfect. As if they didn’t have a LOT to learn about each other before reaching that level of good lovemaking.” — [deleted]

“That there’s one person out there that’s perfect for you. No! There are billions of people! Most are not right for you. They live too far away, speak the wrong language, are too old or too young, or are the wrong gender. Disqualifying them, there are millions of people, and probably hundreds of thousands that you could have some degree of happiness with. Limiting your universe to people that you have a chance to meet, there are dozens, hundreds or thousands of people that you could form a bond with, and be somewhere on the happiness spectrum with. Waiting for the one, or leaving one’s loving partner for the hope of the one, has caused so much needless misery.” — CopRock

“I am irritated about how fast romances happen in movies, particularly Disney flicks. They generally fall in love at first sight and ditch their family and friends to pursue some hot lady. It is always romanticized in film but in real life it’s seen as shallow and quite dickish.” — HeyBlaHHHHH

“That stalking is romantic. Nobody ever says, ‘Why the FUCK are you outside my window?’ or ‘PLEASE STOP FOLLOWING ME TO ALL MY CLASSES, IT’S WEIRD’ in movies.  For fuck’s sake, I get weirded out when someone stands too close to me at the bus stop.” — [deleted]

“Love at first sight. I know it’s more common in cartoons or anime, but having people fall in love with each other without knowing each other just doesn’t work.” — High_Stream

“That because the main characters are in love, the world will bend to their will. Just because you’re in love doesn’t make you immune to being selfish. Other people still matter. I’m lookin at you: Twilight, Romeo & Juliet, Little Mermaid etc.” — arcade_13

“That if a person doesn’t love you for exactly who you are, they’re not the right person. Everyone has vices. Everyone has things they have to change.” — [deleted]