16 Men Get Brutally Honest About How Important Intimacy Is In Relationships

“For me the sex itself isn’t what’s important so much as the feeling of being desired. We don’t have to have sex often as long as I know I’m the only one you’re looking at in that way.” — ImAshroom-69

“A wise man once told me, ‘Sex in a relationship is like a bathroom in a house. It’s not why you’re there, but if it disappears it can be an issue.'” — Fubai97b

“I’d put it as a requirement, but it’s more like ‘we need a certain amount of compatibility sexually for this relationship to work’ rather than it being a primary determinant of how much I value the relationship. Like, beyond a certain point, if sexual compatibility is good enough, it doesn’t matter if it’s the best I’ve ever had or if we have it all the time. Other things are much more important. Nonetheless, if we couldn’t even make each other happy sexually, there’s no way I’d stay in that relationship.” — dungsucker

“I really don’t care at all. I used to think I wanted sex, but then I realized I just incredibly starved of human intimacy. Yes sex is an intimate thing but I’ll be just as happy curled up under a blanket with someone.” — YUNGN0

“Mildly. Physical touch is important to me, but more so cuddling or tender hand holding. Sex sounds great in theory, but I prefer the flirting and the closeness than the actual act.” — early_onset_villainy

“Many things are more important than sex for me–compatibility, kindness, sharing interests, support, and affection are way more important than sex.” — Melancholic84

“Pretty important. I love sex. It makes me feel closer to my partner. I love feeling desirable, vulnerable, loved, trusted, and just good. That being said, if my sexual partners decided they didn’t want sex anymore for whatever reason, then our relationship wouldn’t change for me. I’d miss the sex, and coping might be difficult initially. But as important as sex is, it’s not the be-all-end-all when it comes to loving someone, and I’d still be grateful to have them in my life.” — motherfuqueer

“Crucial. My mom used to say when the sex is good it makes up 20% of a relationship, when the sex is bad it becomes 80% of the relationship.” — WhiteTigressss

“If it’s not important to you, you better make sure your partner feels the same or you are going to have a bad time.” — lone_rutabaga

“As a firmly asexual person, gonna have to go with… not at all?” — pigwigge

“Sex isn’t a super important part of a relationship until one of you isn’t getting the sex you want to be getting. Then it can become very important.” — ethnicbonsai

“Doesn’t have to be a centerpiece but I should never have to beg for it.” — its_Is

“Sigh…Prostate cancer survivor here. Since I had my prostate removed to stave off cancer, I have no sexual desire (this is rare; many men have ED problems, but an unlucky few like me have no sexual desire at all). My wife has been very supportive (we are both in late 60’s early 70’s) and we still have plenty of cuddles and our memories to fall back on.” — amerkanische_Frosch

“Very important, it brings us so much closer.” — Inside-Currency9002

“Very… sex to me isn’t just getting my load off but it’s an actual ‘connection’ to me on an emotional level… being able to communicate with each other and have a good sex life because of it is just as important to me as something as simple like being able to share chores or being able to accept that you might disagree on things and that being more than okay.” — 6F1I

“Not at all important. To me, the emotional intimacy matters. For me, a relationship is a safe space where we can support each other and be there for each other. Sex doesn’t have to be a part of that. Of course, as long as both partners think that way, otherwise there’s gonna be a problem.” — Name-Forsaken