16 Problems Straight People Will Never Understand

Pride month is a time to celebrate your identity – but even in 2022, it’s not always easy being a part of the LGBTQIA+ community. Here are some problems most straight people don’t seem to understand:

“Coming out of the closet NEVER ends.” — mohlmdan

“We can have awful gaydar. I’m bisexual, and I never know if anyone I meet is part of the LGBT+ community unless they straight up tell me.” — LaunchesKayaks

“That being asexual is not waiting for the right person or not having met the right person.” — [deleted]

“Do I fancy them or do I want to BE them?” — thisisaonetimeoffer

“The hypocrisy and double standard that we have to cope with. I don’t just mean the obvious things. What pisses me off is how we still tend to shame young people when they’re first starting to have an inkling that they’re gay. I’m a gay man so that’s my only perspective. Our society is getting better about being accepting of gay adults but we don’t want to face the fact that kids as young as 11 are starting to have their first attractions to the same gender. Here’s where the hypocrisy comes in. How many times do laugh if we see a little boy do something that shows they’re attracted to girls? Christ, America’s Funniest Home videos lasted for a couple of decades off of 10 year olds looking a girls in bikinis at the beach, or the whole audience laughing at a 8 year old boy hugging all the Disney princesses. Or we think it’s cute when a 14 year old girl has an innocent crush on a 20-something year old guy. Now, replace each of those scenarios with a little gay boy doing the same thing towards adult gay guys and I can almost guaran-damn-tee you your reaction is one of discomfort. And yet you giggle if it’s a little boy showing their attraction to a woman.” — JMCrown

“Just because I’m attracted to women doesn’t mean I’m attracted to all women. I had this problem when I first came out. A few of my female friends decided me being a lesbian meant I was obviously in love with them. Strained our relationship a bit.” — mstarrbrannigan

“Having everything attributed to your sexual orientation, especially if you do something that’s not stereotypically associated with it. You’re not just any old janitor, you’re a gay janitor, as though sucking dick underpins your ability to clean up public bathrooms.” — punkterminator

“I can be aware of the fact that someone is objectively attractive and not be attracted to them. People will legit show me a pic of their (male) date, I’ll say ‘cute!’ And they’ll be like but wait aren’t you a lesbian??” — Redjay12

“Just because I happen to be dating someone of the opposite gender, I have not turned straight. I’m still just as bisexual as I was last year and the year before that. Also, bi women are not automatically interested in a threesome with you and your s/o.” — RockPrincess01

“Being gay can be isolating. There aren’t that many of us compared to the straights and finding people to date/marry can be really hard.” — danthemanatee

“Whenever you meet someone, having anxiety because you don’t know whether or not they’re one of those who don’t want you to exist.” — Girl_in_a_whirl

“I wish straight people could understand the fear that sweeps over you when you see politicians arguing and gaining support for denying or taking away your rights and freedoms, for simply being what you are in your heart and soul. To see a man on TV running for a seat to represent the citizens, stand at the podium and essentially say that you are less than, wrong, shouldn’t be, or you don’t belong… It makes you lose faith in the world.” — Bane_Meatball

“How hard it is to accept being gay. Straight people are par for the course. It’s the default sexuality for 97% of the population. But for gay/bi people like me, it can be the most frustrating thing to come to terms with. When I was 12, I knew I was attracted to guys, but I thought I would feel different a few years down the road. Well, I learned that it doesn’t work that way, and I’m obviously still gay as the day is long at 19 today. I spent 7-8 years of my life trying to change a wired-in part of my identity because I was worried people would think of me differently if I told them I was gay. Once I told myself that it’s okay to be gay and that everyone I knew was accepting, it was easy to tell other people. Don’t underestimate the power of denial.” — [deleted]

“Sex ed. Even if your school had pretty bad sex ed, a straight person probably understands the basics of how it works, what to expect, etc. You’ve got to do lot of internet research if you want to know about gay sex ed. I’m sure gay sex ed will be an even more controversial issue than sex ed is already, but it would seriously help.” — BreadPresident

“The fact that they say ‘you can be gay but not in front of me’ that’s still not acceptable” — Squared14

“Straight people assume that, in today’s climate, that it is easy to be LGBT because gay marriage is legal. However, I don’t care what city you are from, you still have to deal with gay or bi-phobic people. I’m bi (not out at work) and idiots will say, at work, that only girls can be bi and there is no such thing as a bi dude. A lot of straight guys will not hang out with bi dudes because they think that you will hit on them because they assume that you are into every dude. Then on top of that, a lot of gay guys don’t really like bi dudes because they think that we can pass as straight or that we will leave a dude for an easier life with a woman. Women, even bi women, find bi guys disgusting and view you as less masculine because you also sleep with men. I had an ex girlfriend make fun of me for being bi and she never respected me. Dating is not necessarily easier for bi people as people think.” — [deleted]

“EVERYTHING we do is affected by our sexuality. We aren’t rubbing it in your face, you just won’t stop making it matter. Will this hotel we stay at turn us away? Can we safely hold hands in this area without getting shot? What if it gets out at work I’m married to a woman and they fire me? (I realize you can fight for this but do you got the time and money? Cause I sure as fuck don’t.) Speaking of the rubbing it in your face bullshit, me mentioning that I have a wife is not rubbing it in your face.” — heyitsbay