30 Toxic Phrases That Are Concrete Red Flags

Ask Reddit wants you to look out for these massive red flags. Also for those on the dating apps, here are some more phrases that are quite prominent on those.

1. “Look what you made me do.” Shifting blame for their own actions onto others is a serious red-flag.

2. “I’m sorry that you feel that way.” They shift blame to you and never apologize for what they did.

3. “If you don’t do X, then I’m breaking up with you.” There is a clear difference between using this phrase to manipulate and using this phrase because you don’t want to tolerate toxic behavior.

4. “No one will ever love you as much as I do.” I know it’s kind of obvious to anyone with half a brain but the only two people who have ever said this to me were both malignant narcissists. Run!

5. “You’re overreacting.” I feel like this is often a manipulation technique, to make your feelings feel unreasonable and to make you doubt yourself.

6. “Look man, I’m just brutally honest.”

Most of the time that means, “I’m going to be a dickhole.” It’s almost a surefire way to figure out if someone is going to be a problem in the future, and it’s an especially bad sign when someone you’re dating says it to you.

7. “I’m a good person.” Typically, when a person has to repeatedly assert that they are a certain way, they usually are the opposite.

8. “You’re so mature for your age.” Especially if speaking in reference to minors. Major red flags.

9. “Work hard play hard.”

In a job description, it means: “You’re going to be expected to meet inhuman targets and will be pressured to join a company sports team.”

And from a person, it means: “I’m a workaholic who will put my FOMO issues ahead of your feelings.”

10. “All of my exes are crazy.”

11. “If you can’t handle me at my worst then you don’t deserve me at my best.”

12. “It’s all on you, it has nothing to do with me” as they pressure you and insist you give them attention/support/free time as it suits them.

13. “I can’t live without you.” If it’s not in a joking manner, my first thought is that they are either very clingy or manipulative.

14. “I don’t get along with other girls.” Be wary of anyone who defines themselves by the people they don’t get along with.

15. “What? Don’t you trust me?”

16. “I’m a nice guy, why do degrading slur for women always pick bad guys?”

17. “I don’t get angry easily, but when I do get angry, I do X and Y.” People bragging about a violent streak is so weird to me. I’ve never responded to anything with violence. Ever. I assuming that this is because I’m a well-adjusted person.

18. “You’re too sensitive.” I will NEVER trust a person who says that to me. Like yeah, I am sensitive, but I own that shit, and other people don’t get to decide I’m “too much” of this or “too little” of that. That’s not up to them.

19. “I want to be spoiled.” I’ve always seen that as give me everything I want without any reciprocation or even thanks.

20.“We’re more than coworkers/employees. We’re family!”

21. “I’m not racist but…”

22. “I don’t like drama.” If you hear that, or a variation of that, walk away. Trust me, they are all about that shit.

23. “I do trust you. It’s other boys that I don’t trust.”

24. “I’m a very sarcastic person.” 100% of the people who think that sarcasm is a personality trait are in fact just rude.

25. “Do your research.” It usually means the person bought into some crazy conspiracy theory and wants you to do your research, but only the research that agrees with them.

26. “You’re not like other girls.”

27. “If you loved me you would…” Hasn’t happened to me but my sister’s boyfriend tried to pressure her into a threesome with that line.

28. “I‘m a nice guy, I never get the girl.”

29. Ruuuuun when the girl says: “I’m high maintenance.”

30. “I’m fine. Just tired.” When one of my friends says this. I immediately know something is wrong.