Thought Catalog Agency

6 Concrete Signs It’s Actually YOU Who Isn’t Ready For A Relationship

You hear so much about the other person in a relationship being the problem, it might be hard to fathom that the blame could go the other way. But if things arenโ€™t working with the person youโ€™re dating, perhaps itโ€™s actually you who isnโ€™t ready to make it official. If any of these signs sound familiar, you should rethink the relationship and let this person go. After all, if you wanted to commit, you would.

You can go a whole day without even thinking of them.

You have so much going on, we get it. Youโ€™re busy, busy, busy. And thatโ€™s the excuse you use when you get a text from them at the end of the day and go โ€œoh, right, Iโ€™m dating someone.โ€ If you were all-in, youโ€™d be thinking about them throughout the day. No one wants to be an afterthought.

Theyโ€™re the last to know about monumental news.

You find out that youโ€™re getting a promotion and you text your friends, you call your mom, you let your mail carrier know. Heck, even your barista knows before the person youโ€™re dating.

Youโ€™ve hesitated to introduce them to friends and family.

Maybe you havenโ€™t even dissected why youโ€™ve avoided having them meet your inner circle. All you know is that every time theyโ€™ve brought it up, you find some excuse to put it off. If you were all-in and wanting a relationship with this person, youโ€™d be excited for them to meet your favorite people.

You donโ€™t want to make it Instagram official.

Youโ€™d prefer to keep your social media free of the person youโ€™re dating, but why? Theyโ€™ve asked if you could post pictures of the two of you together, and you hesitate. Perhaps itโ€™s because a part of you isnโ€™t ready to make this relationship official, especially to the public.

You constantly worry that theyโ€™ll โ€œget the wrong idea.โ€

You hold back affection, you choose your words carefully, all so you donโ€™t give them the idea that youโ€™re more invested than you actually are. The best relationships are the ones where you can be your true authentic self. If youโ€™re holding back, thatโ€™s a red flag.

You keep pushing back the DTR discussion.

Clearly, the person youโ€™re โ€œhanging outโ€ with wants more, because theyโ€™ve tried to broach the subject multiple times. Youโ€™re putting if off defining the relationship because youโ€™re not ready. Maybe you hope that youโ€™ll be ready soon, but if it hasnโ€™t happened yet, you might never get there. At some point, you have to let this person go. They deserve someone whoโ€™s as invested as they are.