Love Advice For People Who Rarely Last Six Months In Relationships
Itโs hard to find a relationship that lasts forever, even if thatโs exactly what youโre looking for. Just remember, youโre not alone in your struggles. Plenty of people are in the same boat as you, even if it feels like everyone you know is paired up. Here is some love and dating advice for people who rarely last more than six months in relationships:
โTheir concerns or complaints might be stupid to you, but to them itโs important. That thing they are complaining about that you think is silly is not silly to them. Leaving a spoon in the sink may seem trivial to you because you would do all the dishes in the world for that person, but they are interpreting the spoon in the sink as not giving a shit. Their perspective is their reality. Regardless of whether you think it is stupid and a bad perspective, do with that information what you will. Either you need to adjust your behavior to be more conforming to their preferences or you need to accept that their preferences are too unreasonable. DONโT just say โyour feelings are dumbโ and think youโve won an argument. There are only two solutions to the problem. You fix your behavior to meet their needs or they have to adjust what their needs are. People are unlikely to change their needs.โ โ YourMomSaidHi
โMost dating experiences and relationships donโt work out and thatโs OK. Most of the time it has nothing to do with you or the other person not being great, or needing to improve in any way, itโs just not right. Itโs like spaghetti and ice cream โ both are delicious, but not together. Spaghetti needs to find some Bolognese sauce and ice cream needs to find some hot fudge. If youโre not feeling it with someone, you donโt need any excuse to leave, if you want out you can go at any time. As long as you tell the other person in a way that shows youโre a decent person (be calm, donโt criticize them, be decisive, and respect their privacy), youโre fine. In the same vein, donโt try to stick with something when youโre just not feeling it just because you think the other person is great, or the best youโll every do, or itโs better than being single. Donโt try to change yourself to please the other person and get them to like you more (however learning to compromise is different, and this is important). And if you feel like someone is sending you signals that they might want out (often misconstrued as โmixed signalsโ), just make it easy for them and go. It may make you feel like shit to break it off with someone who will likely find it a relief you took care of the dirty work, or only wants you when they feel like they canโt have you, itโs better for everyone that you free yourself to find someone better. Ice cream, go find your hot fudge.โ โ zazzlekdazzle
โTalk to them when youโre upset. They canโt read your mind. If you hold all your negative thoughts inside it will just make you feel bitter about everything until it stops working.โ โ Nadodan
โFind someone who you can go on vacation with. It sounds easy, however, if thereโs someone that you donโt want to get rid of at the end of a vacation, youโre probably okay with them.โ โ buffywho
โWhen it comes to fights, have the memory of a goldfish. For the good stuff, the memory of an elephant. And never keep score. Youโre a team.โ โ Gwentastic
โYou and your partner should also be best friends, straight up opinion but I think a lot of people forget that your SO really should be someone you love spending time with, not someone who is just there to say theyโre your significant other.โ โ 8hoursago
โThings take time, hard work, and dedication. The spark is going to die after the honeymoon phase. Donโt take that as a โgive upโ sign. Take it as a sign to try to bring a new spark in. And nobody can tell you how to live your life. Not even them. Make sure you know what toxic signs are and donโt justify anything.โ โ [deleted
โBe happy on your own. Donโt rely 100 percent on your relationship if you need happiness. There is always a time where you are on your own and you need to please yourself.โ โ Twinners01
โWhen youโre in a relationship, make sure that youโre staying in it for the right reasons. If youโre staying for security, convenience, because youโre โafraid of being aloneโ, or anything of that nature, then just leave.โ โ [deleted]
โAbove all, be yourself. Donโt get caught up in trying to be somebody you think others want you to be.โ โ Spicey-Kisses
โEstablish, maintain, and respect boundaries. Learn to compromise and apologize. Youโre growing together. Itโs you two verses the world, not you two verses each other.โ โ AskMe4AJoke
