11 Red Flags He Wants You For One Night, Not Forever

“They ignore you 90% of the time and the other 10% is them trying to get you to come over to their place or trying to get you to invite them to yours.” — jhjack2414

“They come on strong, lovey and romantic, but pretty fast are full of excuses about why it’s not a good time for them to have a relationship, yet they don’t want to break up. Then there is the other, more insidious version who doesn’t even come out and say they don’t want to be in a relationship (i.e. with you), they just start running hot and cold. When you ask them about it, they just brush it off – trouble at work/with the family, feeling tired, allergy season, you are being too sensitive, you are the one acting weird, etc. The hot and cold continues, but if you ask them directly if they want to be in a relationship you get non-answers – they pontificate about how they don’t like labels, they make you feel impatient/clingy/obsessed with meaningless timelines, they say they can’t do it right at that very moment (but imply they can very soon), they can’t decide because they have too much going on, etc. But you know it’s not about you not being patient enough. It’s about them not treating you decently, and you just have to hit the eject button yourself and break your own heart.” — zazzlekdazzle

“When they take no interest in your life. For just an example instance they cherry pick all the photos of your body or face from Instagram and ignore all the other photos of your interests, hobbies activities etc.” — shaggalikesaxes

“They call at random times to see if you are available right now. And they only have a short time to spend with you.” — madoneforever

“I figured it out after awhile. 1) Do they take you on actual dates, or do they just want to watch a movie at someone’s house? 2) What do they talk about on the date? Themselves? Sex? Do they ask you questions about your life? 3) Do they communicate consistently or do they just text days later and say they’ve been busy? 4) After a little time goes by, it should be very clear that they’re into you and dating only you. I made a short list of what I wanted in another person. It wasn’t physical. It was basically all of the above list. If I saw they weren’t doing the first two or three things, I moved on immediately. I met my wonderful husband not long after.” — triples_of_the_nova

“They are pushy and disrespectful of a no. HIM: Can I have your number? ME: I don’t give it out until we meet. HIM: Aww but I don’t come on dating apps often, whatsapp is better, you can trust me, etc etc etc.” — bee-sting

“If they start talking/writing about sexual stuff right away.” — FlyTerrible

“If they want you to send them a lot of pictures.” — FlyTerrible

“Not just sexualizing you, but playfully accusing you of being the sexualized. A platonic friend and I agreed our relationship wouldn’t be romantic or sexual; he always assured me he valued me as a friend. As soon as I took his assurance at face value, he would increasingly point out ways that I was sexualizing our relationship. If I looked at him I was ‘checking him out,’ I lent him a book and it had some hidden message that we were the perfect partners, I slept on his couch one night and I was ‘avoiding temptation.’ He let us have a friendship and convinced me that I was the one making it confusing, so confusing in fact we might as well try dating since he blurred the lines anyway, even though he was twice my age. I will try my damnedest not to mistake someone else’s attraction for mine ever again.” — Ocean_Stoat_8363

“If they message you for the first time by referring to you by a pet name (sweetie, baby, etc).” — inkieBing2

“In my experience, guys that want a relationship simply will show up and be persistent. They will call you, text you back, ask you questions, and show genuine interest in your life. Guys who want sex will do the bare minimum to achieve it, then they will ghost you or find a way to end the ‘relationship’.” — alltheplants05