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10 Concrete Signs You’re Ruining Your Thirties
You don’t want to waste your thirties. They’re such a precious time in your life. Here is some advice on what not to do if you intend to make the most of this decade:
“Getting married for the sake of getting married to someone who isn’t the right partner, just because the majority of their friends tied the knot and they don’t want to be different. Marrying without sharing a connection and common values is definitely a mistake. Then comes the usual mess: having kids to fix the marriage, maybe cheating happens, or the family becomes dysfunctional somehow. Marriage is not the only way to find a place in the world.” — Rare_Hovercraft_6673
“Not listening to their burnout signals and just settling in for the long haul. You’re not going to make it. And if you do ‘make it’ you won’t like yourself or the sacrifices you had to make along the way.” — JetKeel
“I think the biggest mistake I made in my 30s was kind of going on autopilot. I’m 42 in a month, and, to be dead honest, I’m not sure my 30s even happened. It feels like I went from 29 to 40. And I think it’s because I just kind of kept my head down and carried on as usual. I should have spent that time being more pro-active. Stupid me, but it doesn’t have to be stupid you!” — MothraWillSaveUs
“Thinking they are too old. It’s never too late to switch career paths or look for a new relationship or start taking care of your health.” — Mans_Got_Cheaks
“Panicking. You do not need to have a great career, partner, 4 bedroom house, and baby on the way just because your 20s are over. Relax.” — CampusTour
“Any type of toxic relationship that ruins your life. It’s literally around every corner and nobody sees em coming until they’re screwed. Can destroy you mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually. Can take years to recover.” — SnooHesitations8361
“Biggest mistake I made in my 30s was not enjoying them more. Young enough to party, still play some sports, and perfectly in place in any bar. You have energy, you have a circle of friends (that will get smaller, trust me). Try to carpe a diem every once in a while, the decade passes VERY quickly.” — hockeynoticehockey
“Not getting over or at least somewhat understanding your childhood and parental issues. Understanding that stuff can make the rest of your life easier.” — redpaloverde
“Staying at a job they are severely unhappy at and accepting toxic work environments.” — Dry_Muffin_5905
“To summarize my points below: Your 30s are when you are really in the thick of ‘adulting’. It’s easy to lose focus on what is really important to you among all the demands and responsibilities.
Not Fostering Friendships: As you enter your 30s, maintaining and nurturing friendships becomes more challenging. It’s a time when connections can fade, and forming new ones becomes harder. It’s very important to invest effort in the friendships you currently have. A few people might be wondering about what to do when people don’t reciprocate? My advise – keep trying! Everyone is under water in their 30s, they likely won’t be able to make every attempt at outreach you make. But over time as things become less hectic they will remember you kept trying (without guilt) and will appreciate it and come back to you. But toxic people, yeah cut those out!
Not Nurturing Your Romantic Relationship: Responsibilities increase in your 30s like careers, parenthood, and caregiving for aging parents. It’s common for the most crucial relationship – your romantic partnership – to be inadvertently neglected. Avoid taking your partner for granted, assuming they’ll always be around, or treating them as an outlet for your worst moments.
Not Preserving Your Identity: Similar to the previous points, your 30s come with a whirlwind of conflicting priorities that can lead you to lose touch with your identity. It’s easy to forget what truly brings you joy and satisfaction. Maintain a hobby that gives your life purpose and regularly reflect on whether your job still fulfills your needs in terms of purpose, financial stability, and overall satisfaction.” — hyperside89