How To Master The Art Of Being Alone
Two years ago, like most of us, I spent over 75% of my time alone. The pandemic offered an endless supply of unstructured time to use how we pleased, given the limitations. Some of us filled that time with a new hobby or a new TV show, and some of us sat alone in our spaces waiting for time with company again.
At first, it was really uncomfortable, and I thought I felt lonely because I didn’t know the difference between being alone and feeling lonely. Such an increase in free time means time to face things that have subconsciously been suppressed. Solitude has never been welcomed in our society. Personal advancement is vital because it allows you to create your own narrative without the restrictions of societal influences.
A few weeks in, my focus shifted from everything I had lost, what we all lost, to how I could make this time the most effective for my own well-being. I had previously struggled with burnout; I could never figure out how to alleviate what caused my burnout.
Life had been moving beyond me, leaving me feeling like I was trying to build something that was being dismantled against all my efforts. As time passed, those things worthy of keeping in my life were slowly revealed, and things I had not identified previously as negative were becoming less welcome in my new mindset.
I began respectfully eliminating things that no longer served me in a positive fashion. This came in the form of friends, jobs, habits, and technology usage. Almost two years later, I do most things alone, but I continue to value my friends, family, and time spent in a classroom. Social interaction becomes more enjoyable without the pressure of trying to be the person others would like and instead just being who you are once you know who you are.
Being in solitude helped me build empathy that extended beyond my normal perspective, and it allowed for creativity in an empty space. My life has been far less stressful and my time has become of greater value. I can wholeheartedly say I feel peace and love for who I am becoming. I wish this for everyone.
When you feel like you don’t have enough time to be alone, allow yourself to be busy with spending time with yourself.
Actively making the choice to be alone gave me the opportunity to become a better daughter and friend and to be of better service to those around me because I finally accepted myself. By rejecting others’ perceptions of me, I also began to identify others who were comfortable being alone. I noticed how they carried themselves with ease, and were fully content in their own worlds. So today I ask you to go to the store by yourself, maybe out to dinner, or close your door to your room and sit in the company of the person closest to you: yourself. It will look different for everyone, but the rewards are worthwhile.
Honor yourself with the gift of time.