If I Could Go Back In Time And Tell My Younger Self Anything, It Would Be This
As a young child, you ran through puddles, laughed without fear, wore unmatched clothes, danced in the living room, flew through the house with handmade capes, ate snow, asked a million questions, and lived with excitement each day your eyes opened for the day.
Dear self, at the age of 4, you understood the meaning of life.
As the years passed, you became tarnished by things around you. Magazines were sensationalized with unattainable bodies, making you feel as though yours was not good enough. The “in-fashion” hairstyles were silky straight ‘dos; you had beautiful, thick locks of curls, and suddenly you hated them. You started to notice the color of your hazel eyes, wishing they were blue. Everything about you became inadequate. That once uninhibited child became reserved and shy.
Sometimes, the world gives you a million reasons to hate yourself, it casts light on the negative outcomes, and in turn, you focus on that. What if we could go back in time and receive a letter from our older self? What would it say?
I know what I would say.
Dear self, turn off the television, put down the magazines, and put your sneakers on. Pull out your pencil and paper and draw a beautiful picture; grab your pillow and bonk your brother in the head for a pillow fight. Turn off the lights; run on the carpet with your socks and shock your friends with the handmade static electricity. Take the pallets from the backyard and make a fort, eat chocolate sandwiches, and play hide and seek until your mom calls you home.
Dear self, the school years were tough. You processed information differently, you had to work harder to understand, but that didn’t mean you were stupid. On the contrary, your talents were abundant. Don’t be consumed by what other peers think of you—they have their own struggles. Be confident!
All of your anxieties came from a lack of confidence. Newsflash: YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Everyone on this earth has different shapes and sizes with their own special characteristics. You are unique for a reason. Do not take for granted the extraordinary gifts you have to offer.
Be happy with yourself. Never put your happiness in another person—you will always be disappointed. You can be in a relationship and feel lonely, so find your passions in your life and go for it!
There will be many people in your life who will try to get you to conform to society’s rules. They will tell you all the ways in which you will fail. Use it as fuel to become whatever you want.
Life will always throw you curveballs. Shit happens, but don’t respond. Have an unwavering belief that there is a lesson to learn and grow from. Believe it or not, there are no failures—that is how you will learn, rise above, be strong, and face issues head-on. Information is power!
When you get into a relationship, listen to your gut—it’s never wrong. Find your voice, speak your truth, draw boundaries in the sand without fear of rejection. See the value in your existence even if they don’t. Do not take anything personally. Be selfish with your time and energy. Love with your whole heart, even if it gets broken. After all, no one can really break your heart. Take the good experiences from it and love again. Let them leave if that is what they choose to do—another door will open for you.
When your children come into this world, find ways to work around them. Be present for them, find ways to earn a living and be a full-time mom. Set the bills aside—the laundry can wait and the grass can be cut later. Go for a bike ride right now, and go down the slide. When they want to snuggle in your bed, let them. Hold their hand when they ask, hug them as long as they want, lay down in the driveway so they can draw around you with chalk, and let them play with your hair.
One day you will wake up and they will be grown and your eyes will well up with tears as you wish you could answer one more question, hear one more belly laugh, and yes, even the potty talk that made them giggle. Send them to bed a little later, spend a little more time playing with them outside, and cherish every second—it won’t last.
Divorce may happen. You will lose family members—that is inevitable. Be courageous. Be an inspiration to others and yourself. Find ways to forgive what may seem unforgivable—it will be a chain around your heart if you don’t. Be supportive, visit with your parents more, cultivate friendships, and be independent. Do not follow another person’s footsteps—blaze your own trail.
Dance with your soul, listen to more music, and try not to get caught up in any politics, because this world does its best to divide people. Life is truly about helping others and appreciating someone else’s views; do not judge.
Make sure you take care of your health. You are not immune to sickness or injury, so listen to your body and treat it like a temple—it’s the only one you are going to get!
Dear self, carry around a picture of your 4-year-old self and look at it every day. She deserves happiness; she is innocent and beautiful. Do not deny her the beauty that surrounds her. Allow her to be quirky and wild. Be patient and kind with her heart, for she is learning to love herself.
Dear self, you are middle-aged now. It’s okay to start fresh. Time is never going to stop, so grab your happiness and manifest the life you want. You may be scared, but dig deep inside and see your strengths. You were born for love.
Dear self, I believe in you; I am proud of you. You are creative, intelligent, and sexy as hell – YOU CAN!