You may have heard the phrase, “You are who you surround yourself with.” The law of attraction postulates that negative thoughts bring negative experiences into one’s life and vice versa. Bringing ambitious, successful, and driven people into one’s life brings that same energy into your own.
Many have used the phrase “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” to demonstrate the importance of having good people with good intentions who can bring that energy around you.
In a business, in the entertainment, sports, and politics industries, to be working in the public eye makes it even more of a challenge to be judicious about who you spend the most time with and the kind of people you can allow in your life. Yet even for people outside these industries, being picky about who has your time, energy, and attention is crucial. Being particular about those things gives you a real shot at success. I am a living, breathing testament to that.
Over the past year, I recognize how much personal growth and fantastic experiences I have had in the political industry. Because of those valuable experiences, I have learned to always be aware of your social environment. When you have goals, dreams, and ambitions, you don’t always have the time for relationships that waste it. You won’t have the time to force intimate relationships without purpose.
Instead, I’m going to dedicate time, energy, and love to those who are changemakers. I will be there for those who are also there for themselves and me.
Leave the ones stuck in the past and surround yourself with future makers. Our time. Our energy. Our effort. I often feel guilty, as though I owe others my time and must cater to their wants and needs, even when they haven’t earned it. Thus, I ask you: What about your needs and wishes? What about your time and energy? Haven’t you made the right to protect those things, too?
As my youth community engagement work grows, so does my influence and my need to become more reliable. That is why I must be even more vigilant about what I tell others I spend the most time with , including friends and associates.
What I can and will do is to keep uplifting community members by helping them recognize their potential. I pride myself on assisting people in seeing their true potential. Everyone deserves to know that side of themselves. Yet, for those who choose not to heed my advice when asked for or the direction of others, it can become a futile effort. Please do not waste time on those who do not value it.
Even if you don’t intend it, the undesirable characteristics of others can rub on you. It happens naturally. They shape your personality, world perspective, and even your language. It is not selfish to choose your circle wisely; it implies you are aware of your future’s importance. You are learning enough about yourself to recognize what type of people you attract and the type of people best suited for you will help you reap the rewards of an extraordinary future.
Let’s go back to that law of attraction; you are what you attract because you attract people with similar personality traits and characteristics. Generally, I am drawn to people who are self-motivated, driven, continually eager to learn, passionate, and have aspirations to change the world. Thus, I will become the same. Incredible how that works, right?
Personalities that I want to avoid are those with mindsets characterizing a victim mentality, self-pity, grudges for wrongs done to them, past-oriented, and lacking passion. Those characteristics are the mantra of those who squander the past and resort to helplessness when things get challenging. I am someone who is always looking to the future. I always need to know what my next steps are. I must always be resourceful if I am future-oriented. If I am to grow, I cannot surround myself with those perspectives.
I urge anyone with high ambitions to keep people close to you that bring you higher in life and remove everything from your life that does not set you up to succeed. That can be anything that makes you weaker, tears you down, and holds you back.
Here is a scenario: close your eyes and take a deep breath (or not), then reflect on being a self-motivated individual with ambition, making you determined to be one of the few that truly fulfill your life goals. It may be the case that you are a member of the small fraction of people that have made significant triumphs for their age that most could only dream of. Then you come across some that perhaps do not foster a similar mindset nor have yet to create a vision of where they want to be in 10 years.
If you spend so much time with that person, you’ll find yourself straying away from your goals as they have strayed. You’ll find yourself being unproductive as they have, and all because you spent time with those without drive. You adopt their mindset—you become as they are.
You will slow your true potential by not holding yourself accountable and letting go of those who don’t have your best interests at heart. Letting go doesn’t always intend to cut them off completely, but letting go means not being as involved with them.
Friendships are naturally unforced and developed. My experience is that the best friendships are those developed unexpectedly. Throughout my life as a young adult, I have struggled with a life lesson: You are not going to be everyone’s cup of tea, and not everyone is a best friend. As a result, I understood better what kind of person I want to become and acknowledged that the individuals I spend the most time with will impart their personality traits, knowledge, and characteristics to me.
A life lesson in choosing your friends intelligently and focusing ahead has strengthened me in getting to know myself. We are naturally not everyone’s cup of tea, and I want to instill confidence in everyone reading this that finding fulfillment starts with themselves.