Hakob Kotolkian

No, Your Future Partner Doesn’t Think You’re Too Damaged To Be Loved

You’re scared.

You’re scared that all this bleeding of your heart and recurring grief is seen as ugly to everyone around you.

You’re scared that you’re too messed up. You’re terrified that everyone will see right through you, that they’ll say you’re nothing but damaged goods.

I’m here to tell you that you’re not too damaged to be loved, and your future partner doesn’t think so either. 

In fact, you aren’t damaged at all, but healing. Fresh wounds and healing wounds look the same at first. The difference is new growth.

You’re not too damaged to be loved. You’re having a human experience. 

You aren’t damaged, you’re re-birthing. You aren’t damaged, you’re shedding. You aren’t damaged, you’re speaking out. You aren’t damaged, you’re empowering yourself and others. You aren’t damaged, you’re honing in to your tribe. 

Yes, that includes a partner who values your love, a partner who loves you back fiercely, a partner who loves you because you’re human and vulnerable and not pretending and sometimes a beautiful mess. 

I want you to know that the right person is going to hold you. They’re going to see your flaws as maybe a minor annoyance, but it won’t matter because in their eyes, you’re perfect. They don’t want to risk losing you.

I know you can’t see it right now, but I promise you the vision is sure. The vision is true. I know because I’ve heard and seen it time and time again from the men around me as they describe what they’re willing to do for the woman they love.

I know you feel like you’ve been skipped, that everyone else gets chosen but you, that everyone else gets forever, but you. It’s better to wait for the right love than fall into the wrong one. You deserve a love that’s healthy.

I want you to know that you deserve to be loved intentionally, rather than almost. 

You are not too damaged to be loved.

There’s no messing up the person that’s meant for you. When you’re depleted, they hold a higher vision for you. They aren’t looking at the so-called damaged pieces that you’re fixated on. 

They see your beauty, and I want you to see it too. I want you to see it first. I want you to hold that vision for yourself.

I want you to gather all your fears and throw them into the universe to be exposed, even if only to yourself, because that’s where healing starts.

Your shame turns into your survival story. Your imperfections turn into your innovation.

In case you still don’t believe it, you’re not too damaged to be loved. Someone is praying to find you, just as you are. While one person says, “you’re too much,” another says, “you’re just right for me.” Your person isn’t going to run away from you. They’re not going to be fixated on your past. They’re not going to view you as used up, outdated, or irrelevant.

They only want to start a future with you. Your future partner wants to take away your pain and co-create a better life together. They compliment you. They understand that you’re a healer, speaker, supporter, and they’re by your side, cheering you on. The right partner is going to look at you in awe. 

You aren’t damaged, you’re healing. You aren’t damaged, you’re releasing. You aren’t damaged, you’re rebirthing. You aren’t damaged, you’re shedding. You are damaged, you’re speaking out. You aren’t damaged, you’re empowering.

You’re not too damaged to be loved, and your future partner doesn’t think so either.