Read This Before You Decide To Get Married

I see you. I know how happy he makes you; I know how in love you are. I know there is something inside of you that is yearning for more. I know you want to get married.

Marriage for many women is something that has been instilled in us from a young age. Many grew up with the idea that marriage is the pinnacle of success for a woman. So, here you are, going about your life hoping to be chosen, hoping to gain the title of wife, hoping to soak in every bridal excuse to wear white and show people your new ring.

But what I want you to know is that marriage is big. It’s not just the person you can take cute Instagram pics with; it’s not the fun bachelorette you’re dying to have. It’s so much more! Being a bride and being a wife are two very different things. All you see right now is the ring you want to have, the trip you want to take with your friends, the dress you want to walk down the aisle in. All those things make up a wedding, but they do not make a marriage.

Marriage takes more than love. Marriage is full-on commitment. It’s compromise, it’s trust, it’s communication, it’s support, it’s finances, it’s values, it’s forgiveness, it’s selflessness, it’s being with someone who you want to face everything with, the good and the bad.

It’s one of the very few life altering decisions you can make. So, ask yourself: Are you really ready? Does the person you’re with want to get married?

I rather you be single than married to the wrong man just because you want to have an “experience”. Marriage isn’t just a moment, it’s forever.

The time will come when it does, but in the meanwhile, understand what it means to be a wife and know what you truly want in a husband. Don’t fall into putting all the work and time in your Pinterest wedding board as opposed to really talking and working things out with the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Have hard conversations, make sure you both are on the same page about what you are both willing to compromise and what are you not, about what expectations you have for your partner, about what goals you trying to achieve. Do you know each other’s family? Do you both want kids? What health conditions might you face? What lifestyles do you envision having?

I want to prepare you, not scare you, so have fun with these. Explore one another, and most importantly, wait well—I promise you it will be worth it.