Meruyert Gonullu

Rejection Can Actually Be A Good Thing (If You Let It Be)

I mean, no one likes getting told they’re not wanted.

I can’t think of a person I’ve met that genuinely enjoys rejection. If you’re emotionally mature and can understand that a lot of times (even though it might feel like it) rejection isn’t necessarily personal, it’s still tough to process.

Someone, some people, some job, something looked at you and decided they just really didn’t like it. They really didn’t want it. They didn’t want you.

The tough part about rejection, the part that I don’t think we highlight enough, is the separation that exists right in that moment.

The minute this news is given to you, the burden is off of the other party. They get to let you go and walk away. Which, in reality, they should. That makes sense.

That doesn’t take away from the fact that now you get to sit with it for however long you hold on. You have to turn it over in your hands, look at it from every angle, and ask yourself, “Why?”

I think it’s smart to do this. Every time rejection comes knocking on your door, you should open it and examine what’s left on your doorstep. You should ask yourself, Is there a way for me to grow from this? Can I take even a crumb of this information and use it to make myself better?

That being said, you can’t hold on forever. Rejection and the lesson she brings is valuable, but it’s not permanent and it shouldn’t be. It’s a fleeting feeling, much as anything else is. It’s another lesson in a long life of them, but it’s not everything about who you are.

Rejection is generally pointed and specific. It can be based off of someone else’s environment, one comment you made one time, or a general misunderstanding of who you are. It’s not your whole picture. It’s not everything that makes you who you are, it’s one thing that one person interpreted once.

You’re so much more than the rejection you receive because of your ability to receive it, learn, grow, and move on. There’s more to you than the no’s you receive in this life. For all of the times you’ve been told no, counterbalance that with your opportunities. Remind yourself that though this one time you weren’t given a chance, there will be twice as many where you will.

So yes, you should take a look at the reason behind this rejection and try to learn a little. But don’t hold on for dear life. Don’t examine it for too long. It just doesn’t matter that much, if I’m being honest.

Learn a little, let it go, and move on. You’ll be infinitely happier if you do.