Remember: You Will Always Be Enough For The Right Person

After going through a breakup, a glimpse into my thoughts looks like: “What’s wrong with me?” “Am I unlovable?” “What if I had done ___ differently?” But throughout the years, with time and countless heartbreaks, I’ve learned to reframe these thoughts. It’s easy to fall into a hole of what ifs and ruminate about how you could have done things differently so that you could be someone that they choose to be with. But the truth is that you couldn’t and shouldn’t do anything differently. If you showed your authentic self and offered your whole heart, there is nothing more that you could have or should have done to make them stay.

They couldn’t see and accept you for all that you are, but there will be someone that will. You should never dim your light. You shouldn’t change or shrink yourself to fit into the shadow of someone else. Your self-worth and self-love should not waver because they walked away. You should be so content with yourself that their absence doesn’t alter your sense of self.

You are worthy of the love you put out into the world, and even though you wanted them to be the one to receive that love, sometimes they just weren’t the one, and that’s okay. One day you will find someone that is open, willing, and able to embrace your love with open arms and reciprocate the love that you’ve yearned for, the love that you’ve dreamt of, the love that you deserve. Until then, find that love and pour it into yourself. Be so invested in yourself, in unearthing the best version of you, that their absence does not falter your growth.

Know that in the long run, what now feels like a devastating blow will be a blip in your existence. Let yourself feel every emotion, as daunting as they may be. Instead of distracting yourself, take a step back and give yourself time to simply be, time to breathe, time to process. Be okay with sitting in your thoughts and sharing them with your loved ones. Be grateful for the lessons that this experience taught you. Be grateful for the beautiful memories, for this window in time that you allowed this person to see you, to try to understand all that you are, and provide you with a home in their heart.

Sometimes things change in the blink of an eye and what once felt like home becomes a distant land. The spark in their eyes each time they saw you dulls, and the feelings they once had fades away. You can’t hold onto the hope that they will eventually revert to the person you fell for. You can’t blame yourself for not being enough. You are enough. You will feel like more than enough to the right person. You need to keep the hope that one day, someone will see you for all that you are, accept you, and support you through all the peaks and valleys that is the journey of life.

There will be someone out there that looks at you with that glimmer in their eyes that will never fade. Until you find that one, work on becoming the best version of you. Remember that you have been, and forever will be, whole. You’ve developed a strong sense of self, you’ve aligned your values, needs, and desires, and you will attract someone that will complement your whole being.

You will find someone who fights for you, who shows up for you day in and day out. You will never have to settle for anyone that treats you any less than you deserve. You will not be afraid of walking away from what no longer serves you. You will not be afraid of being alone. You will embrace your solitude and find strength in yourself and trust that eventually you will find the love that sets your soul ablaze, that gives you a sense of support and security in ways you’ve always dreamt of. Until then, focus on finding that love in yourself—for yourself.