Strong Couples Know These 11 Things Matter More Than Love

“I would say that enthusiasm is incredibly important. Enthusiasm for going places with your SO (shopping, eating out, adventures, and talking), when making love, doing less than exciting things together (chores, cleaning, etc.), and just being present and happy are important. And if you’re not happy, or if you don’t like certain aspects of what you do, this is where communication is important. If you communicate how you feel, your SO won’t feel bad if they discover on their own that you do not enjoy something they originally believed you did.” — TheInsaneDump

“My SO has a theory on successful relationships. He says you need love, laughter, and lust. Love and lust? While full of passion, it’ll most likely burn itself out and lead to hurt. Love and laughter? That’s just friendship. Laughter and lust? Well the sex may be great, but it probably boils down to just friends with benefits; no sense of commitment. But having all three? A passionate sex life, with commitment and adoration, and a healthy dose of fun? That’s the key to a successful relationship (it certainly works in ours, anyway!!)” — PhoenixKnocks

“Communication. And not just talking. There are more ways to communicate than by talking. Some people communicate their gratitude by doing chores for you or cooking a special meal. To them, those actions speak for themselves.” — [deleted]

“The relationship has to be your safe harbor from the world. It’s easy when times are good, when you’re happy and having a good time. But when shit goes down, if you’re turning away from your relationship for comfort, the relationship will start crumbling. If you seek comfort in other friends, alcohol, etc while cutting off your partner from your thoughts and feelings and needs, you’re eroding away at the base of the relationship. The relationship has to be the number one place you turn to when you need strength and comfort and reassurance that you will get through this.” — scythematters

“Shared goals. There’s gonna be problems if one of you wants to settle down, raise kids, and have a stable job and the other one wants to be a globe-trotting transient with no responsibilities.” — sakkaly

“Being able to fight well. I’ve come to really appreciate that my girlfriend and I can have healthy fights, because it means we don’t sit there and build resentment.” — Personage1

“The ability to delay your anger for a minute to let the other person explain/try again. I started giving my fiance a second chance when he said something stupid/hurtful, and we legit stopped having huge fights. Now I’ll just say, ‘I’m gonna give you another shot, because if you mean what you just said, I’m going to be really pissed,’ and he takes a minute to recollect his thoughts and try again. It’s also trained me to remember that, at the end of the day, most things aren’t worth me getting angry about. We both win!” — ColorMeStunned

“Realistic expectations of each other. You’re not going to get the laundry list of ‘ideal qualifications’ that you made before meeting him/her. But, if you genuinely love each other, you come to love them anyways and either find the things you didn’t want to be wonderful or just something you can live with and compromise around. They also can’t complete you and be your one and only thing in life. You need to have your own interests and hobbies and activities. I’ve seen way too many individuals broken because the relationship broke or because one partner died. Those individuals have been left without a social circle or direction and it leads to much more loneliness and depression. You partner should complement and not complete your life.” — GirlDontThrowawayMad

“I honestly think the best relationships are those that are founded on mutual respect and support. Each person should respect their spouses decisions, feelings, passions (including hobbies), accomplishments etc.” — [deleted]

“Effort. Some advice, if you think getting married is supposed to make things easier then you better think again.” — LindenZin

“To not make the other person responsible for your happiness. It’s better to make yourself happy and then have a good time together.” — creyk