The Only Way To Grow Is To Survive The Discomfort
We all have an easier time identifying those who hurt us, who have broken our hearts, who have betrayed us, and left us in disbelief. However, it is far more difficult to recognize how we can stand in our own way.
Does this sound familiar?
1. You leave a relationship you know is toxic and unhealthy for you. You’re managing well, but after a few weeks you miss your ex/ friend/ loved one so intensely and feel so uncomfortable without that person in your life. Those feelings drive you to go back to that relationship.
2. You want to live a healthier lifestyle so you begin a new exercise and diet regimen. After some time, however, you miss all the foods you used to eat more frequently, your body is physically aching in ways you’re unaccustomed to, and you’re realizing that some days you even have to skip your favorite shows in order to get in a workout. You begin to think that perhaps you bit off more than you can chew. Gradually, you begin working out less and eat less cleanly.
3. You want to leave a job to embark on a new endeavor. However, the thought of disappointing your boss and coworkers or what they may think of you once you give in your two weeks’ notice is unbearable. You decide to stay on despite your gut feelings that you’ve outgrown this job.
Growth of any kind requires knowing that things are going to get messy, awkward, and very uncomfortable. Yet we often attach negative connotations to this discomfort, believing that it is a sign that the step we are taking is not the right fit for our lives. When this discomfort rears its head, we often have thoughts such as:
– “This must be the wrong move for me. If it was right, I wouldn’t be feeling so uncomfortable.”
– “This is too hard for a person like me. If it was meant for me, it would be a lot easier.”
– “I don’t know why I thought I could do _____. This is harder than I thought it would be.”
It took me a long time to come to this realization: Discomfort is simply part of the growth process.
Just because it hurts does not mean it’s the wrong move for you. Just because it feels scary and intimidating does not mean you shouldn’t take the leap. Just because it’s hard does not mean it’s time to give up.
Growing literally implies increasing, stretching, and expanding. This naturally comes with tension. This comes with discomfort that we must learn to tolerate, accept, and push through. When we are willing to do this, when we are willing to be uncomfortable for the growth we desire, we give ourselves the best opportunity to arrive at the other side, where we know deep down we are meant to be.