This Is Me Choosing To Love Myself Unconditionally
I love that girl I used to be and I love the woman I am today. There really is nothing wrong with me after all. All the negativity, the bullying, the lost friends, the hate, the judging, that had nothing to do with me—to a point—but no one was to blame. And I see that now.
I was missing something and the experience shattered me. Whether it was how I saw my mother growing up or the lack of confidence, I just wasn’t strong enough to stick up for myself. I didn’t know that it was okay to be me.
I now see myself in a bright light—most days, anyway. I am perfect the way I am. I am beautiful after all.
I know I don’t have to explain myself to anyone who will pretend to listen anymore. I know I don’t have to warn people that I suffer from anxiety and depression in hopes that they’ll cut me some slack. No, I don’t owe you an explanation of why I am the way I am. I don’t have to be extra nice to you or overly friendly.
I don’t owe you shit. But I do owe myself a safe and loving home within my flesh, which I have to create for myself daily. I do owe myself love, appreciation, and respect, even when others don’t provide it—especially when they don’t.
I no longer need someone to save me or help me feel better because I learned how to self-soothe. It feels good to have me. Of course, it’s awesome to have kind people around, people who accept me. When you don’t love yourself or know who you are at your core, it’s easy to miss those who do see you and love you for it.