Iyke Ibeh

You’re Not ‘Too Much’ (They’re Just The Wrong Person)

You’re not too much.

You’re never too much.

Sometimes, they’re just the wrong person.

You’re not “too much” for wanting to be treated with respect.

You deserve someone who understands you and your needs. Someone who will respect you and your heart and your time. Someone who compliments you and makes you feel special. Someone who asks questions and puts in an effort to get to know you on a deeper level. Someone who you can trust and never feel anxious about. You deserve someone who treats you with respect simply because you are a human being.

You’re not “too much” for wanting more than just enough effort.

You’re not needy and you’re not asking for “too much” from someone who is only offering you the bare minimum. You deserve so much more than that. You deserve someone who will communicate properly with you. You deserve someone kind and trustworthy, who listens to you, who you can confide in, who remembers the little things about you. You deserve someone who will go out of their way to bring your favorite coffee or a bouquet of flowers.

You’re not “too much” for wanting to spend time with them.

…And for wanting them to want to spend time with you.

Quality time is important in every relationship. You and your partner, at the very least, should be friends. You should want to hang out with one another and build a connection. And if you want more than just a quiet night cuddling on the couch and watching movies, you deserve that. You deserve fun, planned dates to the movies, to a museum, to a fancy dinner. If that’s what you want, you shouldn’t settle for someone who isn’t giving that to you.

If you’re feeling unappreciated or misunderstood by someone you’re with, especially if you’ve already expressed your concerns to them, it might be time to evaluate the relationship and let them go. Not everyone is capable of giving the way you give and loving the way you love. Not everyone will appreciate you in the way you hope or expect. You deserve someone who will never make you feel like you’re “too much.” You’re enough. You always have been and always will be enough, especially for the right person.

You were never asking for too much, you were simply asking the wrong person.

Bianca Sparacino