6 Concrete Lies Your Anxiety Has Been Telling You
Allegra Messina

6 Concrete Lies Your Anxiety Has Been Telling You

Your anxiety is tricking you into loving yourself less than you deserve. But you can’t allow those dark thoughts to win out. You can’t believe the horrible things that you have been telling yourself. Here are some lies that your anxiety has been telling you:

Your friends are all mad at you.

Anxiety is complicated because it makes you feel like you’re completely worthless, but at the same time, it can convince you that the world revolves around you. When your friends aren’t able to hang out or take a little too long to answer a text, you assume you must have upset them. You assume they want nothing to do with you. You assume that everything is about you, when really, they’re probably just busy doing their own thing. It probably has nothing to do with their feelings about you.

You have no idea what you’re doing.

Anxiety can make you feel like you’re unequipped to handle anything, even the basics. Conversations are difficult. Leaving the house is difficult. Everything you do feels like an uphill climb. But that’s why you should be impressed by yourself. These little things are harder for you than other people, but you’re still conquering them. You’re still getting it done. What’s more badass than that?

You’re a complete failure.

Making a few mistakes doesn’t mean you’re a failure. Most of the time, it means the opposite. After all, if you’re trying something new that you aren’t an expert in yet, you should be proud of yourself for taking a risk. You should be patting yourself on the back, whether you succeeded in the traditional sense or not. Everybody messes up from time to time. Everybody experiences setbacks. You might not see them because others hide them so well, but remember, you are definitely not the only one who has fallen down. What matters is whether you pick yourself up again.

You aren’t intelligent/talented/skilled enough.

Anxiety makes you shrink yourself. You don’t want to take up too much space. You don’t want to talk too loudly or for too long. You don’t want to inconvenience anyone with your questions or your existence, in social groups or in the workplace. But you have a right to be where you are, just as much as anyone else. You belong there. You have earned your place, whether you feel like this is true or not.

You won’t be missed if you cancel plans.

You don’t want to fail to show up for the people who love you because you’re assuming that they wouldn’t notice your absence anyway. Others care about you more than you think. Your opinion matters more than you think. So don’t isolate yourself due to the assumption that no one will miss you anyway. Someone will.

You are unlovable.

Your anxiety might make you feel like you’re unlovable, but you have proof that that’s untrue. You have been loved before, by friends and family members, and you will be loved again. No one else is judging you as harshly as you judge yourself – and if they are, they don’t belong in your world. You need to surround yourself with people who uplift you, not people who are determined to drag you down.