6 Concrete Signs You Need Stronger Boundaries In Your Next Life Chapter
You don’t want to allow others to walk over you. You don’t want to let them get away with treating you terribly. You need to make your expectations clear and put your foot down when they try to pressure you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable. Here are the concrete signs you need stronger boundaries in your next life chapter:
You always end up doing what everyone else wants while neglecting what you personally want.
You shouldn’t let others pressure you into doing whatever they want to do. If you aren’t interested in a certain place or activity, then they should respect your decision. They shouldn’t guilt trip you into changing your mind and giving them what they want anyway. You need to set strong boundaries about what you are and are not comfortable with because the people who genuinely respect you will respect your boundaries as well.
You automatically offer forgiveness to everyone who hurts you, even when their behavior has become a pattern.
You don’t owe anyone your time or your forgiveness, especially people who are having trouble treating you the way you deserve. While giving them a second chance is generous, giving them tenth and eleventh chances is probably not the best idea. If they can’t figure out how to treat you properly, then they don’t deserve a space in your life at all. But if you aren’t ready to say goodbye to them yet, at least assert stronger boundaries so they know what you are and are not willing to stand.
You consistently swallow your emotions and withhold your opinions.
Your thoughts matter as much as anyone else’s. You shouldn’t feel like you need to keep your opinions to yourself in order to ‘keep the peace’ or because no one would care how you feel anyway. You should be surrounding yourself with people who value you and want to hear what you have to say. Otherwise, they aren’t looking for a real partner or friend. They’re looking for a cardboard cutout to stand next to them.
You resent how much you’re doing for others and how little they’re doing for you.
You might not mind going above and beyond for your favorite people – at least in the beginning. But eventually, you are going to grow to resent how much effort you’ve been putting into every interaction while they have barely lifted a finger. And you should feel upset about this. It’s not fair to you. And you need to erect stronger boundaries so your relationships don’t end up feeling so one-sided.
You never dare to say ‘no’ even when you want to do so.
Even though you want to be there for your loved ones, they don’t get unlimited access to you. You need to set stronger boundaries so they know that you aren’t available to them at every second of every day. You have your own life too.
You feel a general sense of unhappiness and discomfort.
You don’t want others to take advantage of your soft heart. Remember, you can be kind and strict about your boundaries at the same time. Standing up for yourself isn’t being cruel to them. It’s showing kindness to yourself.