How You Win Their Trust, Based On Their Birth Month
April
You stand up for them.
Those born in April are always having to defend themselves from the world, always preparing for the worst so they’re never caught off guard. When they see you take their side publicly, have their best interest in mind, and draw a line in the sand for their benefit, they’ll be forever grateful. It’s rare for anyone to come to their rescue, because they give off an “I can handle it” vibe just by breathing. But knowing someone is in their corner, uninvited, will unlock a level of trust and loyalty like no other.
May
Show them receipts.
Someone born in May doesn’t invest anything without provenance, so you have to take them into your element and let them see exactly where you’re coming from. You want them to know you’re career oriented? Invite them to that networking function you saw on LinkedIn. A good friend? Introduce them to your oldest besties who can give the most accurate testimonials. How family and relationship oriented you are? Introduce them to your parents. Those born in May know you can find any knock off on the street, but quality pieces need to come straight from the source.
June
Be on time.
People born in June want you to show them they’re a priority. Fitting you into their busy schedule doesn’t just happen without thinking, they have to actively choose you over all of the things on their to-do list. So when you flake last-minute or mosey in 20 minutes after you had agreed to meet somewhere, it shows them you weren’t worth the effort. But when you’re already waiting for them at the movies with popcorn or seated at the restaurant bar with their favorite drink, they know you’re the person they can depend on.
July
You have to ask for it.
Someone born in July won’t be holding an open casting call, so if you want to audition to be their closest confidante, you’re going to have to request it directly. They’re used to being self-sufficient, to working through their problems and emotions alone, so if you want to become the shoulder they lean on, you’re going to have to pay for a significantly sized billboard that says, “Hi, this is a shoulder. It is available specifically for you, to lean on.” It might take them a second to catch on, but once they see your initiative and perseverance are genuine, they will take you up on the offer.
August
You treat others well.
Someone born in August knows that personalities have a way of spilling into every area of someone’s life. So they’re not going into business with someone who cheats on their spouse, not starting a relationship with someone who is always dropping friends, and not going to share secrets with the biggest gossip in their social circle. If you want to earn their trust, you’re going to have to demonstrate trustworthiness. In the way you talk to and about others, in the way you exercise discretion, and give others the benefit of the doubt. It’s not about never having a negative word to say, a red flag in and of itself, it’s about never crossing the line of being intentionally hurtful.
September
You follow their rules.
Do you see the perfectly straight line of shoes by the door? Then take yours off when you walk into someone born in September’s home. Have they told you about their hectic schedule recently? Don’t text too late or too early. Are they a proud parent of a fur baby? Say hello to their dog and don’t just ignore it like some neanderthal. Pick up on the cues that their very clear and methodical way of communicating leaves for you. Once they see you respect them, their needs, and interests, they will deem you worthy of their trust.
October
Reciprocate.
The quickest way to earn someone born in October’s trust is to entrust something of your own to them. Maybe it’s opening up to them with a personal story, asking for their help reviewing your resume, or giving them a set of keys to your apartment to water your plants while you’re on vacation. Once they see that you deem them to be a close, reliable person they will start to see you in the same light. They will know you owe them one and can be counted on when they need someone to open up to, someone to ask for advice, someone to lend a hand.
November
Time and space.
Someone born in November needs to see you as gentle and patient. As someone who won’t force their hand before they’re ready or get bored and leave because the gratification didn’t come soon enough. You just need to be there. Calm and consistent. Observant of their changing moods and expressions, inquisitive about their current emotional state and needs. Once you’ve expressed the right amount of interest, not too much or too little, they will allow themselves to trust that you are around for the right reasons.
December
You make them feel special.
Someone born in December wants to be noticed for who they are, not for the attention seeking behavior they perform to break the ice. They want to be approached in quieter moments, sought out for their mind and their heart. Once they feel you’ve taken a genuine interest in them as an individual, in their inner self, they will open up the encyclopedia of their interests and experiences to you.
January
Mirror their qualities.
Someone born in January is already dependable, dedicated, determined, and driven. So it’s up to you to prove that you can match their level of trustworthiness. Are you consistently around whether things are easy or hard? Are you actively demonstrating how important the relationship is to you? Have you overcome any obstacles or road bumps with them? Do you have an end goal in mind with them? A lifelong friendship or romance? someone born in January wants a robust plan for your interpersonal relationship, and it needs to be thought through. Iron out the details and you’ll be in business.
February
Have your own opinion.
Someone born in February doesn’t trust anyone who doesn’t have their own convictions or moral compass. They want to see that you can be your own philosopher, not just regurgitate talking points from your preferred news or podcast. They want to know you’re not afraid to tackle moral gray areas or look deep into the most controversial topics. Once they confirm you are thoughtful and confident enough in yourself to tread hot water without burning anyone in your wake, they will know you can be counted on.
March
Emotional vocabulary.
Facts are great, but when push comes to shove, the majority of interpersonal conflicts are about subjective experiences and how they make each person feel. Someone born in March will trust you if you are able to clearly articulate your own experience, especially as it relates to them. If you can casually tell them the something they did upset you, they’ll know that you value the relationship enough to not let small disagreements drive you apart. And the next time they have similar feelings, they’ll feel comfortable approaching you the same way.