If You Want To Find Your Astrological Soulmate, Stop Looking At Your Sun Sign And Start Looking At This

As we learn to grow, evolve, and express the highest version of ourselves in our adult lives, we learn to seek relationships that mirror, reflect, and teach us what it is we need to know and embody. Perhaps no one, or no group of people, is as influential as our soul family. This is especially true in terms of those in which we have intimate partnerships and relationships with, if that is something we choose. As the old saying goes, opposites attract. That’s true in astrology, right?

Right — and soulmate qualities are often not found where we’re looking.

Soulmate qualities have less to do with our Sun sign and more to do with our Descendant.

Our Rising (or Ascendant) sign expresses who we are when we are at our most heightened level of consciousness. This is our highest and most true self, the energy we enter this lifetime with, and it expresses what we are meant to manifest in this lifetime. In terms of psychology, the Sun can be thought of as our ego, the Moon as our inner, and the Rising as the highest part of our psyche.

Our Descendant, the sign laying directly across from our Ascendant, represents who we are when we are in the shadowy depths of our unconscious. As adults, we tend to seek intimate partnerships that bring out internal projections. We may find ourselves dating the same “type” of people or falling into the same relationship traps. With awareness, we understand who and what we tend towards and can learn where we need to fill in our gaps in order to more fully express who we are and bring light to our light side. Being whole as a person allows us to be a true soulmate for someone else.

Our Descendant gives us insight towards the qualities we tend to seek in intimate partnerships. We usually gravitate towards people who activate the deep layers of our unconscious drives and desires, revail our projections, and show us what it is we need to do in order to grow into the most highly-evolved version of ourselves. This supports the authentic ideals and aspirations of our Ascendant to show up completely. Usually, we need someone else to show us where this shadow lives, to inspire us to safely lean into it, and discover a way to use its message for good.

As a Libra Rising, I often struggle with decision making. I tend to feel weighed down by the pressure to “keep things together.” I struggle in neglecting my own self-expression for following social norms and to pleasing others. The stress of this adds up, and ironically takes away from the gifts I bring to the world. As a result, I often seek partners who demonstrate direct, confident, simple-minded, honest, and sometimes aggressive qualities. I secretly want them to make my choices for me, and at the same time I don’t, because I am sick of not standing up for myself.

It is my job to learn from my partners rather than turning towards them to save me. It is not their job to “do” anything for me, but rather it is my job to learn from them. I can witness (and love) their assertive and confident nature, and I can use it as a way to more fully embody those qualities within me. I do not have to allow social norms and people pleasing to drive me.

Rather than leaning towards our partners to fill in our gaps, it is our job to rely on them as teachers — those who support and uplift us, those who see our shadowy sides, and those who can encourage us to use its gift to take care of ourselves fully.

As a result, the qualities of our Ascendant helps and inspire our partner(s) to grow into the most highly evolved version of themselves. As a Libra Rising, I inspire my partners with an Aries nature to see themselves as assertive leaders who are able to push things forward, and encourage them to lean more fully into the beauty of embodying their humble, selfless, and truly loving nature.