The Toxic Habit Each Birth Month Needs To Drop

Research on behavior change suggests the habits we label as “toxic” are often coping mechanisms that once served a purpose but no longer fit our current lives.

Traits like procrastination, jealousy, impulsivity, or overthinking usually come from deeper needs such as safety, control, or validation. The key is not self-judgment, but awareness and adjustment, because change starts when we recognize patterns without excuses or shame. If you have ever wondered what habit might be quietly holding you back, keep reading and discover what your birth month says about what you may need to let go of next.

April

I suppose you wouldn’t be a proper Ram if you weren’t a little bit stubborn. Not only are you stuck in your ways; you’re cemented in your ways. Even if you’re able to spare a mile, you won’t give an inch. You need to learn a little bit about the gentle art of negotiation. It’s good to have principles, but sometimes the principle is not as important as the results. Is it worth sticking to your guns if you mess up the deal and wind up with nothing? Wouldn’t it be better to compromise just a little bit and maybe get three-quarters of what you want? Three-quarters is better than nothing, right?

May

The worst thing about your personality is that you are unmotivated, which is a very nice and overly kind word for “lazy.” You will find any excuse not to do something. Very often, you will expend far more energy avoiding a task than you would have spent just performing the task and getting it out of the way. You will delay a task until it’s almost too late, and you justify this habit by saying that you get energized working on deadlines. When it comes to any assignment or project, there ain’t nothin’ it but to do it.

June

The unseemliest thing about your character is that you tend to be gossipy. And yet you hate when people gossip about you, which also makes you a little bit of a hypocrite. Not only that, you are also a smidge two-faced: You will gossip about one person to another person, then gossip BACK about that other person to the first person you just gossiped about. Invariably, they trade notes about you, and both of them start gossiping about how untrustworthy you are. No one respects or trusts a gossipy person. Is this the way you want to live your life? Just zip your lip when it comes to spreading rumors about others’ foibles, and you’ll be fine.

July

Anxiety is the worst thing about you, and it’s also the biggest obstacle between you and a happy life. I’m not saying you should be anxiety-free. Anxiety is there for a purpose—to make us take action to prevent things that could go wrong. But just worrying for the sake of it? That will destroy your mental health. Sometimes you’ll stay up all night worrying about what can go wrong. But if the thing you’re worrying about hasn’t happened yet, and if you’re worrying without making plans for how to avoid the potential future problem, then the worrying becomes a problem in itself. You need to internalize the meaning of the old phrase “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” Otherwise, unaddressed anxiety will eat you from the inside out.

August

Your biggest problem is a tendency to be impulsive. This can make you exciting and fun to be around. It can also lead you down a path of endless disasters. Whether it’s drugs, sex, gambling, or sudden career changes, you follow your baser instincts rather than your higher reasoning powers. You are focused on short-term thrills rather than long-range planning. Make sure you have a roof over your head, some money in the bank, and a secure future before you decide to act on a whim. If you keep following your impulses, you may wind up with no money, no house, and no future.

September

Your biggest flaw is that you are highly judgmental. As the Book of Matthew says, “Judge not, lest you be judged.” In keeping with that sentiment, famous Russian author Leo Tolstoy said, “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” And there’s a reason for this—it’s much easier to point out what’s wrong with others than it is to face the sometimes embarrassing or unflattering things that are wrong with you. You’re never going to change the world. Your time would be much better spent figuring out what’s wrong with you. Judge yourself as harshly as you judge others. It only hurts for a minute, and then you wind up happier.

October

I’m glad that you at least decided to read this article, because I have made a decision to inform you that your biggest problem is that you are indecisive. Because of this, you’ve passed up several golden opportunities in life. I realize that you don’t want to make the wrong decision; the problem is that no decision IS the wrong decision. No one’s asking you to make rash or uninformed decisions. Take as much time as you need to make a decision, but not more time than you can afford. Here’s a tip: If you can choose to be indecisive, you can also choose to be decisive.

November

If you were a little more secure, you wouldn’t be so jealous. And, like all bad character traits, there’s an underlying reason for this. Maybe you had siblings that you felt your parents favored over you. Maybe you’ve been cheated on before. Or maybe you’ve been a cheater and expect everyone to be like you. The simple fact is that you don’t deserve anyone else’s love or attention. You can’t demand it; you need to earn it. Get rid of all that energy you spend being jealous, and work on your powers of charm and persuasion. You’ll wind up so happy, others will be jealous of you.

December

Your worst trait is arrogance. Not only do you think you’re better than most people—you make this point clear to them. Hey, you can think it all you want, and in fact, you may really be better than they are—just don’t tell them. This is the crucial difference between arrogance and confidence. Whereas confidence is an essential tool for anyone who wants to be successful, arrogance can thwart the best-laid plans of even the most confident and talented person. I’d suggest you keep your high opinion of yourself, whether it’s justified or not, to yourself. It’ll be our little secret.

January

I’m not sure that you realize how unfriendly you come off to other people. Many of them don’t have the courage or assertiveness to tell you this, but behind your back, they often describe you as cold, aloof, and gruff. And it’s not intentional; you simply seem to think that a lot of overly friendly people are faking it. You don’t want to be seen as a phony, but as a result, you wind up being seen as a jerk. What people also don’t realize is that maybe you’re just a little bit shy.

February

Although those born in February are known as the water-bearer, they really should call you the grudge-bearer. Your biggest fault is that you’re unforgiving. You see no reason to forgive anyone who intentionally harmed you, because you’d feel like a sucker if you did. You suspect that they’d interpret your forgiveness as weakness and simply prey on you again. And maybe they would. What you need to realize is that you’re not forgiving them for their sake; you’re forgiving them for your own sake. Let it go. They don’t even have to know that you’ve forgiven them.

March

It’s good to feel things. No one wants to be an emotionless cyborg. But it’s not good to feel things too much. You are a deeply sensitive person—so sensitive, that you take the entire universe way too personally. This tendency can cripple you emotionally. To be happier, you need to realize that the universe is not out to get you. In fact, the truth is a little more insulting than that—most of the time, the universe isn’t even thinking about you. But once you realize this, you won’t take bad weather personally. You won’t take global events personally. And you’ll feel a million times better.