Subtle Signs Of A Toxic Love

4 Signs Of A Toxic Love

They constantly check in on you – and need proof to back up what you’re saying.

Your person needs to trust you if you want the relationship to work. If they’re constantly quizzing you about where you are and who you’re with, it’s proof that they’re unsure where your loyalties lie. But you shouldn’t have to keep proving yourself to them. You shouldn’t have to send them pictures of the newspaper with the current date, or deal with their car driving past your house to check if you’re really at home. If they don’t trust you, then they don’t deserve you. Their jealousy and overprotectiveness might feel romantic at first, but it’s really a sign of a toxic love. And it’ll only get worse the longer you’re together.

They slowly, gradually pull you apart from your friends and family members.

They want every second of your day to be focused on them. They want every ounce of your attention directed toward them. They cannot stand when you give anyone else attention, not even the dog or your boss or your grandmother. However, healthy relationships are about balance and moderation. Your partner isn’t meant to be your whole world. You’re supposed to have a life outside of your relationship – and if your partner cannot respect that, if they keep begging you to cancel plans and call out of work because they want to spend that extra time with you, something is seriously wrong. They need to learn how to share you. Otherwise, you need to leave.

They convince you that they’re the best you can do.

Whenever you get frustrated with them, they throw everything they can in your face. They’ll act like they’re some sort of savior for putting up with you when you’re the one who is so hard to manage. They’ll try their best to convince you that you would never find anyone else to love you, and that you’re lucky that they’re standing by you when you act the way you do. They’ll tear you apart because they want your self-esteem low. They want you to feel like leaving isn’t an option, so that you don’t realize you deserve better and bolt.

They create rules that they expect you to follow.

They control what you’re wearing, how you style your hair, what you eat, what you watch, and who you text – but they do it in a subtle way. They don’t come right out and demand that you listen to them. But they’ll talk about how much they hate it when other people look a certain way to make their feelings clear. Plus, they’ll be in a horrible mood if you don’t do what they want, and they’ll reward you when you follow their rules. They’ll make you feel like you have to make decisions that will make them happy, otherwise you’ll have to listen to them whine and stomp around and complain. Your opinion doesn’t matter to them. They don’t want you to do what makes you happy. They want you to do what makes them happy.