8 Signs You’re Just A Quirky Gal Who Reads Far Too Much Into Her Zodiac Sign

1. You have literally told your friends to “listen to the stars” when they have had a problem.

Instead of giving them actual advice, you tell them to look upward to obtain the answers they seek. You direct them to your favorite astrology site and tell them to see what the astrologers are recommending for the month.

2. You use excuses like, “BUT I AM A CAPRICORN” whenever you do something unbecoming.

Like, it’s not your fault you’re a heartless wench. You were born in early January, DUH.

3. You won’t date someone if their Zodiac sign conflicts with yours. 

Because everyone knows that a Scorpio def shouldn’t mess with a Pisces. DUH. You crazy?! Besides, modern dating is difficult enough, so if you can at least get some guidance, that’s all you ask for.

4. At least one of the tabs you have open on your computer right now is related to astrology. 

Guilty as charged.

5. Instead of going to therapy, you check your horoscope to see what’s up. 

Maybe it’s just been a shitty seven months because Jupiter has been doing something weird, right?!?! It can’t be the fact you are completely ignoring your intuition and drinking 17 cups of coffee a day and no water. No way.

6. You’ve blamed Mercury being in retrograde for something that went wrong in your life at least three times. 

Sometimes, you’re not even entirely sure if Mercury is in retrograde and you aren’t even entirely sure what “retrograde” means but you’d rather blame the planetary motions you don’t understand than take responsibility for your own shortcomings. Listen, I get it.

7. You’ve said “It’s [insert Zodiac sign here] season!” unironically. 

Happens to the best of us.

8. You ask people about their birthdays the second you meet them to figure out what terrible personality traits might not be their fault.

Birth, place, and time. STAT. And if they refuse to play ball, you figure they’re a Sagittarius. Fair enough!