Raphael Brasileiro

I’ve Fallen Out Of Love With Falling In Love

For the first time in my life, Iโ€™m making plans without taking into account how these plans will affect me finding a significant other. I donโ€™t really care about timelines and being married with kids by a certain age. I donโ€™t have plans to buy a house by the time Iโ€™m 30. I donโ€™t care about saving for a wedding or kids.

Right now, I feel like saving so that I can travel to places far, far away from where Iโ€™m writing this right now. I plan on spending years of my life exploring new places, hiking new trails, making new friends, and investing in things that make me happy.

Right now, Iโ€™m organizing my life around my education. I plan on dedicating years of my time to my work. Iโ€™m content spending Friday nights in front of my computer writing a grant proposal. Iโ€™m more than happy to be unavailable for dates because Iโ€™m at work, making money to travel the world with.

The idea of merging calendars with another human being at this point in my life gives me anxiety. I physically feel like Iโ€™m not capable of loving someone enough to even consider compromising my plans over. Right now, Iโ€™m content with all of my plans involving me and only me.

Iโ€™ve fallen in love with the idea of achieving all of my goals with only me to help me through.ย Over the past few years, I have become my biggest cheerleader and someone that is always available to help.ย 

When I meet someone that I think I might be interested in, I struggle with wanting to add them to the story of my life. The story of me has become something I protect at all costs.

For right now, I think Iโ€™ve fallen out of love with the idea of falling in love.