We will all experience some kind of romantic connection that changes us forever. These relationships are intense, challenging, moving, and a learning experience, and they are what’s called a Twin Flame relationship.
There are 8 stages to a twin flame union. At first, you’re drawn to one another. There’s passion. There’s yearning. Then, there are challenges: insecurities and doubts surfacing. It can be an incredibly toxic relationship, because of how much emotional and mental work needs to be done.
In other words, your twin flame is not your soulmate. Your twin flame does not complete you, they do not make you whole. They are not the person you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with.
Your twin flame is meant to come into your life to challenge you, teach you, and be a catalyst for personal growth.
Desperately Seeking Soulmate: Escaping Twin Flames Universe is a recent Netflix release, a docu-series about a love cult that monetized on love and trauma. This cult ultimately brainwashed people into thinking that their twin flame was a positive, forever thing. They forced people into connections that were toxic and wrong and they convinced people to “pursue their twin flame by any means necessary” — which is incredibly dangerous.
There are a lot of myths around the twin flame connection. You are not meant to be with your twin flame forever and it is in no way, shape, or form, a harmonious union.
These are the dangers of mistaking the wrong person for your “twin flame”:
Believing that someone is your twin flame may lead to unrealistic expectations about the relationship. You’re expecting a perfect connection, believing this is my person and this person is good. You’re setting yourself up for disappointment and frustration because ultimately, no relationship and no person is perfect.
Disappointment and Heartbreak
When someone isn’t your twin flame, they will not reciprocate the same feelings. This will ultimately cause you emotional distress, heartbreak, and rejection.
In the docuseries, one ex-member was told to pursue their twin flame by “any means necessary.” It wasn’t until after she went to jail after stalking him and being served a restraining order that she finally realized the truth: the feelings were not reciprocated.
Ignoring Red Flags
When you believe you’ve met a twin flame, you will be so blinded by the idea of this connection that you might overlook major red flags. You’re wearing rose-colored glasses and ignoring the warning signs because you believe this is the person I’m supposed to be with. You’re so caught up in the spiritual idea of a twin flame connection that you ultimately avoid dealing with practical and emotional issues. This is incredibly unhealthy and toxic for both partners.
Stagnation in Personal Growth
Instead of focusing on yourself, your wants, your needs, your desires, your goals, and your dreams, you’re focusing on the relationship. You’re depending on them for your happiness and fulfillment. You’re so caught up in the facade of a twin flame connection that you neglect yourself and your personal growth.
Difficulty Moving On
In the docuseries, one of the ex-members was told that her ex-boyfriend was her twin flame and that she needed to get back together with him, despite any problems they had in the relationship.
When you mold a relationship into what you want it to be (a twin flame partnership), you’re forcing a connection altogether. You’re clinging to the idea that this is your person. This makes it harder to move on and it ultimately hinders your ability to explore new relationships.