You keep making changes you think other people want you to make.
Instead of changing your hair, clothes, and habits to make yourself happier, you’re making changes in order to please the rest of the world, in order to make yourself come across as more desirable. You aren’t bettering yourself in the name of self-love and self-care. You’re doing it because you’re hoping to get a date out of it. You’re hoping that by becoming a better version of yourself, you’ll be able to make someone love you. But you can’t control what other people think or how they treat you. You can only control how you treat yourself. And you should be working on yourself for yourself, not to impress anybody else.
You jump from relationship to relationship, even when you’re not really interested in the other person.
When someone admits their feelings for you, you agree to date them without a second thought. You never ask yourself whether you’re actually interested in them because you don’t want to be alone for long periods of time. You feel like it’s better to take your chance in a new relationship than stay single. You cannot stand being left alone with your own thoughts, so you search for a distraction. Any distraction. Although there’s no shame in wanting attention and affection, you can’t always search for validation outside of yourself. You need to start finding ways to appreciate yourself so you don’t need a relationship to feel successful.
Whenever you’re alone, you feel like you’re unlovable.
You only feel like you’re worthy of love when someone is currently loving you. The second you’re single, you start to question your worth. You start to wonder whether everything about you is a disaster. If you don’t have someone in your ear, whispering those three little words, you feel like you don’t deserve to hear them. Your view of yourself changes based on whether or not anyone is interested in dating you. But you can’t let other people determine your value. You are the same exact person single as you were when you were in a relationship. Nothing changed except for your relationship status.
You constantly settle for less than you deserve.
Even though it’s better to be in no relationship than a toxic relationship, you have the opposite approach. You would rather have someone there for you, even if that person is treating you poorly. But you can’t allow your desire for love trick you into settling for something shaped like love. You deserve better than a person who speaks down to you, who controls your every move, who makes you feel insecure about your mind and body. Being alone can be rough at times, but it’s always better than wasting another second with a toxic partner.
You feel like you have nothing else to offer, except love.
Even though you have a huge heart and would make an incredible partner, you are so much more than a girlfriend or wife. You are smart and strong and skilled in more ways than you realize. You are capable of finding success in plenty of different areas of your life. Your love life might be important to you, but it isn’t the only point of living. You have friends and hobbies and passions that matter. You are more than your heart.