An Open Letter To My Forever Love

I woke up on a random Friday morning thinking about writing this letter to you. I’m not sure if it’s actually a letter, or a short story, or a summary, but every word that you read on this page is true. It’s crazy to think that I’d be here writing this to you. I never thought I’d be in this situation, to be honest. A part of me had a feeling this outcome would come about but my younger self never wanted to believe it. I remember being 15, after our first breakup, thinking “Maybe we’d get back together when we’re 26.” I had no idea that manifestation would actually come true.

It took some time for me to trust you and it wasn’t easy letting my walls down in front of you. I already had trust issues from the start, way before I even met you. You knew me as this timid, small freshman in high school that, albeit still shy and small, became a funny, silly, goal-oriented woman. I met you as a weird but funny and really cute freshman that, albeit still weird and funny, was a strong and steadfast man. After getting to know you for over 10 years, basically growing up with you and being in and out of each other’s lives, I fell in love with you in each moment. In every kiss, every hug, every fight, and everything in between. Everyone told me it was puppy love and that I’d get over it soon. But you never left my heart nor my mind. Although there were times we wouldn’t talk for months to years, you were still home for me: familiar yet unfamiliar at the same time. You were an exciting treasure I couldn’t wait to open.

Now, years later, here I am writing this to you as your fiancé and wife-to-be. I was scared when you got down on one knee and asked me to marry you. I’m not going to lie. But the fears went away when I said “yes.” Somehow I knew you were it for me. No matter who we dated in the past, I knew you were the one I would share my life with. You amaze me every day. Through our ups and downs, tears and smiles, you remained by my side. Your love covers me and makes me want to be better for me, for you, and us. When there were days when I tried to push you away, you still stood firmly by my side. When there were days you wanted to push me away, I stood by yours. We have a unique kind of love. Not everyone is going to understand it, and that’s okay. As long as we do, nothing else matters. 

When I look at you today, I realize my love for you grows deeper. Our relationship will have ebbs and flows, but one thing’s for sure: There is no one else I’d rather become an adult with. There’s no one else I’d rather share my bed with, eat ice cream at midnight, watch movies on the couch with, grow a family with, laugh with, cry with, and worry about. I’m not sure if I believe in soulmates, but, as corny as it sounds, you’re the magnet and I’m the metal.

I used to say that I wanted my partner to be a best friend. I guess I’ve changed my mind, or that you’ve changed it. You’ve become more than my best friend. You became my family, my rock, my shoulder, my walking-talking diary, and someone who helps me break out of my shell but also understands when I need to retreat back into it. I promise to always be there for you and comfort you when you need it. I promise to grab your hand when you reach out just as you grab mine.

I guess what I’m saying here is, on our anniversary, is that I love you. I am in love with you. Forever and always. To the moon and back and back again.

Happy Anniversary and Happy Valentine’s Day.