Some relationships just run their course.
So how do you know when it’s over? Here are some signs —
Physical intimacy doesn’t sound appealing.
When you first start dating someone, you will feel an undeniable connection to them. You’re drawn to them, physically. This is chemistry. Eye contact, natural body language, laughing, sexual tension, nervous excitement, and good communication, are all signs of chemistry. This is also lust or sexual desire.
As the relationship progresses, the two of you will develop a physically intimate relationship. You’re in the honeymoon phase, overflowing with lust, desire, and passion.
Unfortunately, some relationships will lose that spark. The mutual attraction and sexual desire fade. Maybe you notice that you’re too in your head when you’re being intimate with each other. Maybe you notice you don’t like them touching you anymore — there’s something off-putting about it. Maybe you’ve expressed these concerns to them, you’ve switched things up in the bedroom, and physical intimacy still doesn’t sound appealing to you. Whatever the case, it might be a sign that the relationship is coming to an end.
There’s emotional distance.
Emotional intimacy doesn’t come easy to some people. Being vulnerable is difficult for those who have trauma, anxiety, and ultimately, some kind of avoidant attachment.
When you develop your relationship, the two of you create a solid foundation and safe space for the opportunity to be vulnerable. It gets easier over time.
However, some relationships will run their course, and with that, goes the emotional intimacy. Maybe you don’t feel comfortable sharing your deepest thoughts and feelings anymore. Or maybe they don’t. Maybe you don’t even fight anymore because what’s the point? Or maybe you do fight, but it’s hard to compromise and be compassionate towards the other person’s feelings and opinions. Whatever the case, there’s a noticeable distance between the two of you.
You don’t fight anymore.
It’s normal for there to be arguments in a relationship. You won’t always see eye-to-eye. But if you’re not fighting with your partner at all, it’s a good indication that you don’t care anymore and don’t have the energy to fight for the relationship.
Your goals don’t align.
Sometimes life gets in the way. Sometimes relationships aren’t meant to be simply because your goals don’t align anymore. Maybe your partner got an incredible job offer in another state, but the two of you don’t want to do long distance. Maybe you want kids but your partner doesn’t. Maybe they want to move in together but you still want time to be on your own. Whatever the situation, your goals don’t align anymore. And it’s time to let go.
You’re thinking about other people.
It’s normal to fantasize about other people. But when you start to desire someone other than your partner, that’s when a problem starts to brew.
Whether you’re thinking about a specific person — an ex, someone you might secretly crush on at work — or are just longing for strangers, it’s a good indication that you’re no longer invested in your current relationship. (This goes for your partner too, who could be thinking about someone else.)
The trust is gone.
Maybe your partner was unfaithful. Maybe they don’t keep their promises anymore. Whatever the situation — after trust has been broken, it’s hard to rebuild it. Even if you work together to fix it, there will still always be a slight strain in the relationship that makes it hard to be completely comfortable and safe.
If you feel as if you can relate to any of these signs, then there’s a good chance your relationship might be coming to an end.